Tag: creating memories

LAST MEMORY STANDING

Here is a picture of a sign from the 50th birthday party my lovely lady threw me about a month ago. With our insanely busy lives, we forgot to take it down until today. Here is a pretty cool aspect of that forgetting. Every morning I leave for work at about 4:30 in the morning. On my way to the car, I catch this sign out of the corner of my eye. My first thought is not that it would be far too early to remove the sign, or that I leave such little time to get to work that I do not have the time to stop and attend to such matters. My first thought is so much more powerful and helpful to starting my day off right.

No, the first thought that comes to mind is how much effort and love must have went into throwing me that party. Realizing you are that loved, by someone so amazing, is the best way to start the day. Even though the sign is down now, I will still see it in my head and feel the same way. Funny how when you train your mind to see what you have to be grateful for in your life, everything feels so amazing. This woman puts a smile on my face even at 4 in the morning when she is still blissfully sleeping.

Speaking of great memories, the above photo is yet another example. That is the afore-mentioned lovely lady and I enjoying a little coffee. In case you have not heard, Starbucks is closing over 500 of its locations and one of them was a location we had been to many times. This was the last day it was open and I thought it would be a good idea to create one more memory there. We stopped and spoke with some of the workers about their future plans. Margie even made friends with a dog she saw. Now, every time that I drive by that location, I will remember not only all of the great memories we had there, but this last day they were open when I was able to share one last coffee with the woman I love.

This is yet another example of a memory that we created at this particular coffee shop. We were both working on bringing my second book, Living the Dream, to creation. This post is not about living in the past, but rather being present enough to consider what great memories certain situations would create. It is also about creating and appreciating new ones. Today I am taking my love to the movies to see a film we have never seen and to a new restaurant for dinner. This will be creating two new memories to treasure into the future. When you are able to look back with an attitude of gratitude, it makes all of life magical. Even the hard days seem like a victory.

WHAT REALLY MAKES A HAPPY MEMORY ðŸ˜Š

Above is a breakfast sandwich I enjoyed the other morning at my favorite place, The Wisconsin State Fair. It was delicious. Last year, my mother, Margie and I discovered it the first day we went. Shortly after that, I proposed to her. In reflection, we all recall the sandwich being quite delicious.

With that in mind, I was excited to bite into this one with the hollandaise sauce,ham, and cheese all in a delicious croissant. While it did satisfy my taste buds, it fell short of the year prior. No fault of the establishment. The ingredients were just as delicious.

What was missing? It was the company, the excitement of the day. Here I sat, all alone, trying to recreate that. Margie was baking and my mother was getting ready to help someone else.

What I learned was that it is the people and what you do with them is what makes memories and makes moments special. It not only adds flavor to a lonely breakfast sandwich, but it adds flavor to life as well. If you want to fill your life with happy memories, fill it with special people and loving times.

THE END OF AN ERA

This picture was taken today at the Milwaukee Public Museum. It has been at its current location since 1963. This would be longer than I’ve been alive. Everytime I have ‘went to the Museum’ it has been this one. That includes school field trips, times with family and friends. Even once while on lunch from serving on jury duty.

The Museum will be moving to a new location in 2027. Many exhibits,including this one, will not be making the trip. All things must change and update. I get that. Apparently, this building had fallen into disrepair. The cost to repair would have been greater than a new location and would not have provided the safety for the artifacts.

My mother and I decided to visit and take in the current layout one more time. I have been to this museum countless times. I love learning and history. In an effort to capture the memories, I endeavored to take pictures of as much as I could. To my shock, I discovered things I had missed in my now 50 years of coming here! This includes this old phone operator that can only by viewed by climbing some stairs.

Another favorite of mine is mini dioramas that display different cultures. Today I learned they were made during the depression by artists paid through the works progress administration. Again, after 50 years of viewing these, new knowledge.

A butterfly landed on me in the butterfly garden. This will be in the new location. It still was a cool memory. The lesson in all of this is that things change and we must savor the moments while they are here. Also, when we look at something we have seen countless times with new eyes, we can discover something new.

I will savor these memories and am grateful for all of the years and memories created here. I will also look forward to creating new memories at the new location.

HAPPINESS CAN BE BITTERSWEET ðŸ˜”

Last post I discussed taking my aunt back to her old neighborhood. The thought was she would be happy to see some of the old stores and it would give her a special feeling of happiness. That turned out to be only partly true.

Before we get into that, I should explain this neighborhood. I used to do a radio show there many years ago. I would pick up my aunt before and we would leave her apartment to walk the unique shops. At that time there was an independent created newspaper handed out by hippies in dreadlocks. Now it is a glossy magazine called Shepherd Express.

We began by stopping by my aunt’s favorite Chinese restaurant. It soon became apparent that my aunt’s hearing was not what it used to be. I was hoping to reflect more with her and hear her thoughts on what she remembered. Instead, she seemed to exclude herself from most conversations. When we attempted to converse with her, most times her reply was a dismissive “oh yes. ” Even though it was abundantly clear she had not heard what we were discussing.

At the coffee shop, the music was a little too loud to allow much communication even though we were sitting right next to each other. It was also all of the walking she could handle for the day. Any hopes of reliving the actions of days gone by quickly faded. 

After leaving my aunt that evening, it really hit me that the memory of exploring with my aunt would forever be that – a memory. There had been countless times both of us had talked about doing it, but as happens, life got in  the way. Now, she was no longer physically capable of doing it.

This may seem like a melancholy post. In some ways it is, but it has a message. If there are things you want to experience, do them now! Do not let life get in the way. If there is conversations you want to have with loved ones, even if it is reminiscing about going into occult shops and seeing all the wild stuff they have, do it now. You never know what, or when, time will steal the opportunity from you.

WHAT ARE YOUR 7 MINUTES? ðŸŽ°

This is an interesting thought. I’ve been clinically dead for a bit, but not sure how much my brain lived on before, during our after for that matter. If it is true, and I’m not sure how they came by this information, it brings up several important questions.

The most important one is rather obvious. What is your 7 minutes? Were they when you are younger? Have they come recently? Are they, as this quote implies, tied to a certain person? Have they Perhaps come at a certain location? Maybe your best 7 minutes was engaged in a certain activity?

I think if we view our life in 7 minute blocks, it can help us stay in the present. After all, 7 minutes is not a very long time. I can tell you there have been several 7 minutes in my life that I can recall. The first 7 minutes I spent in Jamaica with Margie. Knowing I had helped make one of her life dreams come true. Even the first time she was able to see a palm tree in Las Vegas. Recently walking hand in hand in the Bahamas shopping and making new friends was amazing. I recall a morning sipping my favorite iced coffee with my mother at the State Fair listening to a band play tropical music. That was an awesome 7 minutes! Speaking of the State Fair, last year I proposed to Margie there. That was a crazy and memorable 7 minutes.

As you can see, there are several people and locations involved in my 7 minutes. I also think of my uncle and I at the Iola car show, my grandfather and I at this rummage event. My grandmother and I playing cards for an entire afternoon. So many good memories! Each one of them is an amazing 7 minutes. How my brain will pick out 7 from all that will be a neat trick. Then again, I am not in a hurry to find out. Instead, I am going to focus on what I will suggest you focus on – creating more amazing 7 minutes!

PICTURES ARE IMPORTANT ðŸ“¸

Many of us, dare I say most, do not like having their picture taken. When I look at my picture, it usually resembles some kind of mutant from a B-movie. It doesn’t help the case that the lady in my life, whom I am usually lucky enough to be standing by, is one of those fortunate souls that looks amazing no matter what.

If we put our egos and vanity aside, we must ask ourselves what the purpose of pictures is even for. It is usually to capture a moment or a memory. Sadly, lately Margie and I seem to be attending quite a few funerals. One of the things you see at most of them is picture boards featuring memories of the deceased. When you see people looking at them, it is one of the few moments people are smiling. For a brief moment they are taken back to a moment they shared with the person they are now missing so much.

Wouldn’t it be a shame if there were few, or none, of these memories available? Sure we may be caught making a silly face, or scratching our butt, but that is what makes life amusing. Having those memories will serve as little treasures of joy when the pain of loss seems unbearable.

This year, feel free to capture as many memories as you can. Even little videos where you have the sound of someone’s voice. Make your appearance in them, even if you think you look like you came from a B-movie set or are scratching your backside. It would be a shame to be left with no memories and then it’s too late.

LEAVING IT ALL BEHIND, BUT TAKING IT WITH YOU ðŸ¤”

Today, we are leaving the Bahamas and this beautiful view behind. We did our best to remain present and soak in all of the memories, along with an amount of salt water. We also took a lot of pictures to capture what we did. It helps jog the great memories we created.

On this trip we swam with pigs in the ocean, took a crazy adventure trip, drank out of a coconut, and visited several beaches. In this way we will take all of this with us. We made friends with many people, and hopefully left a little of us in their hearts as well. To me, after years of practicing, this is how you do a vacation.

Saying goodbye to the delicious food, amazing sunsets, and fun people does not mean we won’t take them with us in our hearts. This is not only a good way to keep one well of our life alive, but every day. Take lots of pictures, but also take it in. Get to know people just beyond their names. Immerse yourself in the moment. We are thankful for the staff at the Warwick Paradise Island resort, as well as all of the places we visited. All the friends we made and people we met. Our spirits are recharged, and we will be ready to give more to our corner of the world when we return.

TAKE IT WITH YOU ðŸ§³

As you read this, I’m heading back to Wisconsin from Jamaica 🇯🇲. It is a sad day for me as I love the warmth, sun and people of this island. We made many good friends here. We had a few adventures. We ate lots of good food. Most importantly, we made lots of good memories.

The important thing is trying to figure out how to take all of this back home with us. We made friends with another couple who live not far from us and I am going to send them one of my books when I return. We took lots of pictures that will help us recall the fun we had. Margie even bought me a fun matching hat and shirt that I will wear and recall this fun trip.

Like the first picture says, it is what is in your heart that matters most. That is why I feel it is important to have a plan for any major event. Know what you want to take away in your heart. The romantic drawing in the sand has been erased by the tide, but the feeling I had when I saw it coming out of the ocean is fresh in my heart. It is these sort of memories one should include as often as you can in life.

USE PEOPLE WHILE YOU STILL CAN!

Let us be clear right from the start, I am not advocating using people in any negative form whatsoever. Quite the opposite. When we are finished with our brief time here together, I think you will have a new appreciation for what ‘using people’ can mean. To illustrate, I would love to share two personal stories of mine with you. The first involves a very early childhood friend. Let us call him Andy because, well, that is what his name was. He was one of my very first good friends. I am thinking somewhere near the age of 3 or 4. I remember he had bright red hair and that we pretty much did everything together. Then, in second grade, he moved away. We never exchanged addresses or phone numbers. To this day, I do not even know what happened to my early childhood friend.

I could blame my lack of thought regarding Andy on the fact that I was only 7 years old. You don’t really think too much about the future when you are that age. That would be fine, except one little problem. Take a look at the picture above. That is a picture of mine and Margie’s friends Curtis and Danie, with their son. They used to run a coffee shop/cafe in town. Both very nice people and I am sure their son will be an outstanding gentleman as he grows up. This wonderful family moved out west to pursue their dreams for their future. Here is the ironic thing. Before they left, Margie and I were saying how much fun it would be to spend some time with them just relaxing and doing fun things. Every time we saw each other, we would say something like, “Yes! Let us set something up!” All of our lives were busy, and sadly, that moment never happened.

Unlike my story with Andy, we at least are able to keep track via social media. In fact, as I wrote this, I messaged Curtis to let him know I was writing something about him. It would seem that I have learned little or nothing in the 40 years since my friend Andy moved away. Before you judge me, ask yourself one question. How many times have you said to yourself, “Man I wish I would have _____ with that person. Now it is too late.” This can hold true of people who moved away or even people who have passed on. We look back and think of how foolish we spent the time that we had with them. That is not to say every second has to be be planned and accounted for. Sometimes, the goal might just to be fully present and focused on enjoying time with someone. Taking time to enjoy their jokes, their voice or the way they look at a certain situation.

I encourage you to think of someone who is important in your life. How can you better use the time with them? Is there a certain activity you wish to do with them? Maybe it is as simple as spending a quiet dinner just slowing down and enjoying each others company? It may seem like work to rearrange a schedule and make things happen. Do you know what is even more work? Living with the weight of regret that you did not make the most of people and moments when you had the chance. I advocate using people. Use them to show love. Use them to show how much you care. Use them to create wonderful memories with. Use them to show your appreciation for the wonderful humans they are. Use people…before it is too late.