Tag: Books

HOW TO GET ANYWHERE…

“A number two pencil and a dream can take you anywhere”

This fabulous quote was given to me by a good friend who saw it on a sign at her work. At face value it seems a little pie in the sky, but is it true? In a word, absolutely. Every great dream begins with these two elements. First we need a dream, goal or whatever you care to call it. Without this step it is hard to get excited In fact without a destination in mind it is hard to get anywhere in life. I relate it to getting in your car on the passenger size, starting the ignition and putting a brick on the gas pedal. If you don’t steer and break you will either end up in someone’s back yard, or in the back of someone’s mini van. Either way effort without direction is wasted effort.

Ok, so you have a dream, now what? Can it really be realized with a simple #2 pencil? The simple answer is yes. Let me relay a personal example to you. When I began work on my book “A Happy Life for Busy People” I had a dream. That was a strong desire to bring what I have learned about living a successful and rewarding life with as many people as I could. What didn’t I have? Any idea what the hell I was doing! This can be the biggest obstacle to people achieving their dream life. It has been mine in the past. You have a great idea, but not the slightest clue as to how to accomplish it. Some see endless challenges and often quick before they really begin. I did this in years past. I would think 12 steps down the line and get so overwhelmed I wouldn’t even start step one. This is where the pencil comes in handy.

When I began work on my first book the same idea constantly came into my mind over and over again. That idea simply stated was “I have no idea how to write a book” So I began to write down everything I could think of. Every question I thought of I wrote down. “How do you get your book printed?” “What website is the best choice to use?” “Who do I know who has written a book?” Then I made lists of pros and cons of subjects. I jotted down ideas and bits of inspiration that came to me. Most of which would later only make sense to me. Considering my wonderful handwriting sometimes even that was debatable. The point being I was literally teaching myself as I went along. I wrote down the information I needed to continue. Then I would write down sources I could get that very information from. Is there a website that has that? Do I have to get a book on the subject? Is there a person I know who could advise me in this field?

I would have to say I would add one item to a dream and a pencil. That item would be a positive and expectant attitude. In reflection I fully expected and knew I was going to write a book. So when challenges arose I would just have to ask myself how can I solve this to move forward? Without this valuable tool you may be inclined to give up. If you totally expect your goal to be reached obstacles just appear as challenges to be solved and not walls stopping you.

Another important thing to realize when chasing your dreams is that chances are someone less talented, connected or gifted has accomplished the very thing you are trying to do. Even if this is not the case, consider how many people have done things others have thought impossible. So if you are considering chasing a dream grab a pencil and a great attitude and begin your journey there!

BUILDING A BONFIRE…

What does building a bonfire have to do with living an amazing life? It serves as a very good metaphor. What does it take to build a good fire? Let’s assume you were never in boys or girls scouts and we will break it down for you. You will need a safe place to do so. Making sure your fire burns only where you want it to. You will need kindling, or small pieces of wood or other flammable material that lights easy but burns quickly. You will also need successfully larger and larger pieces of wood to burn more intense and for longer periods of time. You will need to arrange these in such a way that they burn in the proper order. If you try to light the big log first, chances are your match will burn out far before the log catches fire. This brings us to our last needed element, an ignition source of some nature to start the whole thing burning.

Ok, so we have established what it takes to build a good fire, but what does this have to do with living an amazing life? Here is the answer, your motivation is much like building a fire. You will need to properly keep the fires of passion burning hot and big if you want to be able to push through obstacles toward the amazing life you reaching for. This is true of any goal or project you are working on. You will need kindling, which represents small goals that are easier to obtain as you are on your way to achieving the ultimate goal. The feeling of triumph you feel is like the burning of the kindling that will slowly start the larger logs, also known as bigger goals ablaze. You will need the right amount of this kindling. To little and your passion will fizzle long before you are able to reach your bigger goals. Just as you will need successfully larger more daring and scary goals as you get closer to your prize. You will also need an ignition source. Now many people in life, myself included, have waited for a situation to get so bad that it forces you to take action. Desperation can be a great motivator. So should we sit around waiting for our lives to fall apart so we can give ourselves a big kick in the ass to take the actions needed? Not necessarily. Another great way to motivate your self and ignite your own personal bonfire of passion is to look at what you are missing by not taking action. Grab a pen and paper and start to make a list. What will you lose or are you currently losing by not taking action? How worse off is your life being made by your procrastination? Here is a good time to be brutally honest. Trying to lose weight? How does it make you feel when you go clothes shopping and nothing fits? How does it feel when you look in the mirror? This may seem harsh but emotion is the strongest human motivator. So in addition to this ‘push’ of emotion you can double your chances of success by adding a pull. What I mean here is on another piece of paper, or the other side list how much better your life would be if you did take action. Using the above example, how good would it feel to look in the mirror and like what you see? Write it down, but even better take time to close your eyes and picture this. Really add the element of emotion. How could would it feel to get attention from a person you find attractive? If your goal was financial freedom how good would it feel to not worry about paying the bills or if your job is safe? Write it all down and picture it in your mind. Really add as much emotion as you can.

Now if you have done this all correctly you will have created an unstoppable force that will literally burn through and fear or doubt that stands in your way. Still even after you have created your bonfire of passion for success there is more work to do. Let me ask you if you have a fire going and leave it unattended what happens? Eventually you burn through all the logs you have. So the secret to keeping motivation going is to keep adding logs. Now this doesn’t mean only to keep adding new goals, although that is not a bad idea. Other logs you can add include gathering friends who both motivate you and hold you accountable. Purchasing new books or motivational CDs, taking pictures or your fitness progress or bank statements. As you continue to go towards a goal, you must continue to add logs or your fire will burn out.

WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LIFE?

So what is the meaning of life? Today we are going to investigate and answer that very question. You mean you will not have to climb to the top of some very tall mountain and ask a very old man with a long beard? No actually all you have to do is log on, click on this blog and read the writings of a man who feels old and only has a goatee. OK, I don’t know many of you. Some of you I only know fairly well. Even the ones I know very well how can I begin to tell you the meaning of your life? How if we have never met can I begin to tell you what the purpose of you being here is? Well let me begin by paraphrasing another man with a great name, Neal Donald Walsh, even though he may have his spelling all wrong I believe his thinking is all right. He said in the famous movie The Secret and again I’m doing this from my memory which can be suspect at times. He said there is no blackboard in the sky where God writes “Your purpose in life is ____” A lot of us would like to believe we are all preordained with some divine purpose and as soon as it is revealed our life will be easy and our path will be laid out before us. Sad thing is some people spend their entire lives looking for this writing in the sky. I’m here to tell you something very important – your mission in life is what you choose to make it – True you may have some divine inspiration along the way. We are all given some talents with which to work and things we excel at. We are all driven by different motivations. Martin Luther King jr. was angered by the injustice he saw to a point he decided his life mission was to strive for equality. Mother Theresa was saddened by all the people she saw who needed help that were being left behind so she dedicated her life to helping the poor and forgotten. Musicians see how their music can touch people so they try to spread that feeling to as many people as possible. I was disgusted by how much negativity is in the world so I decided to make my life’s mission to bring more positivity to the world. I am still trying to work out what Paris Hilton’s mission is, perhaps she is still searching. The point here is that your mission, your meaning of life is whatever you decide it is. What are you passionate about? If you noticed in the examples above the passion does not necessarily have to be a positive one to make for a great life mission. So if you find yourself feeling lost, wondering why you are here. My suggestion? Decide why you are here. Spend the weekend examining things you have a great deal of feeling for. Then decide what life means to you. Who knows your life’s mission may change several times in your life as you learn and grow. The main thing here is to understand you are the one who decides what life means to you. So ask yourself this weekend “what is the meaning of life” you can even try climbing the highest hill you can find to think about it. If you grow a beard while thinking you may have spent too much time on the question.

A DREAM REALIZED…

The Tower of Dreams holds all the knowledge, w...
The Tower of Dreams holds all the knowledge, wisdom, history, and insights of the fairies race. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

On December 13th a dream of mine became reality. My first book “A Happy Life for Busy People” was officially released. There was lots of things I learned along this long journey to bring this book to life. One, is that you must never lose focus on your goal and dreams. This was given a dramatic boost by a friend of mine who created a great pendant with the word ‘focus’ and a compass on it which I keep by my computer and it reminds me daily that I must keep my mind, thoughts and efforts on what is going to push me forward. Speaking of that person I have also learned how valuable the people around you are. Friends whose words planted the seeds of that would eventually grow into this blog and then to the book. There have been numerous people to give me feedback and encouragement when I was filled with doubt. As the book came out the support and well wishes filled me with gratitude almost to the point of being overwhelming. So I stress again, pay attention who you include in your life. When important and trying times arise they may be the lifeline you need. When you are about to give up on your dreams these people can push you to believe in yourself even when you may not.
What became apparent in my reflection of this whole journey is how important those words are. That brings two important points to light here. One, thank you cannot fully describe my feelings towards all of those people, and two, how important my encouragement may be for others. I have lots of friends chasing dreams of their own. My friend Cari has written a book that I am sure will change lots of people’s lives. My sister is about to graduate from school and begin a whole new career. How much we may underestimate the power of some simple encouragement from someone around us. So I encourage you to do two very important things as this year draws to a close. One, take a close look at those people who you surround yourself with the most in your life. Are they motivating? To they give you energy or drain your energy? Whom should you spend more time with? Remember it is easier to increase positive than to subtract negative. By adding more positive people to your life, the negative ones will begin to drift away. The second thing I think we could all benefit by doing is searching for places where we can add support to someone else’s dreams. Is there words of encouragement you could offer someone? Maybe something we could do to help their dreams along? The people who have helped me to get my book in the hands of as many people as possible thus changing their lives for the better have been amazing. Therefore as the year ends and a new one begins, part of my new years resolutions will be to help and to serve in whatever capacity I can to bring the dreams of others to light. Look at your own life, do you have friends or family members, maybe even coworkers or strangers who are pushing toward achieving a goal? Lend them a hand or at least an encouraging word. It could not only help them, but in doing so could help them change the world for the better!

LET’S START COOKING!!

Here is a fun and creative idea I just came up with.  Sometimes it works that way.  For those of you who don’t know, I love to cook I find it to be very cleansing for the soul and being able to see and taste something you create always fills me with a sense of accomplishment.  Except for the one late December evening when half asleep I tried to bake cookies and mixed up the salt and the sugar.  Even then they still looked nice.  Back to my brilliant idea.  Ok, in my mind it is brilliant, but trust me my mind is one place we need not go.  I was creating a casserole tonight from a cookbook my grandmother left me when she passed away.  Perhaps it was her inspiration that put this idea in my head, but either way I encourage all of you to try it.  If you do and it works out remember my birthday is July 29th and feel free to send me a copy of your creation.  If it doesn’t work out, feel free to just send cookies.

Back to being serious, which is rare for me.  The cookbook I was using was one of those with the spiral binding.  As I flipped through the pages an idea came to me.  What if I could create a ‘motivational/inspirational cookbook’!  On each page could be a different idea for staying motivated and creating the amazing life we all deserve!  It gets better.  I know all of my ideas, you know all of your ideas, but we do not know each other’s ideas.  So get your self a blank set of recipe cards and hand them out to your friends, neighbors, family, co-workers or anyone else you can think of.  Explain you are making a special cookbook and could they give you their secret recipe for staying happy/motivated/inspired whatever word you wish to use.  You may even give them a self-addressed stamped envelope so they can take their time and mail it back to you when they are done.  You might want to skip that kind of odd crazy friend you have though.  Ok, you can include him, but just put that recipe on the back page. When you are done you will not only have created an amazing list of new ways to improve the quality of you life, but you will also have gained an insight into what makes your friends happy.  That can come in handy on special holidays like…I don’t know birthdays that fall on July 29th.  Ok, my friends, let’s get cooking!

QUALITY AND QUANTITY

There seems to be a statement that is brought to my attention frequently and it may be in the back of your mind as well.  So today we are going to bring it up front and address it.  Honestly before embarking on a life-long journey to live a life as full of passion and meaning as possible this very question plagued me as well.  Ok, I know stop stalling and let us get to the question.  The question I get is this.  “Motivational and inspirational things are great, but they never last and they are never there when I need them most” Although I often feel the same about rum it had me thinking.   Well to answer this I am going to quote the famous motivational speaker and author the late Zig Ziglar who said,

“Motivation doesn’t last.  Neither does bathing.  That is why we need to do it every day”

Following this blog is a great first step into having a motivational pick me up delivered right to your inbox, so be sure to click the link on how to follow this page to make it as easy for you as possible.  I also suggest picking up some Motivational cds to listen to when in the car or if you have a free moment at home.  A book or two would be great as well.  Motivational movies like “The Secret” are good to have around when you just feel like you lose your direction or are just having a bad day.  Feel free to print out your favorite posts from this blog to review when you need.  Remember you are never going to agree with 100% of what anyone says, nor should you.  Each of us has our own unique life and circumstances.  Which is why it is so important to gather as many positive points of view as you can.  Surround yourself with people who are positive motivated people who just might have slightly different way of going about the world.  Keep your mind open to what everyone has to offer.

If we drink a cup of coffee a day (or diet coke or whatever works for you) to keep our bodies going.  We should at the very least expose ourselves to something motivational or inspirational to keep our souls and spirits going.

IT DOESN’T JUST HAPPEN

Sometime in our life we went from being the adventure seeking young child, to the adult waiting for life to happen to us.  A view that also affects our view of happiness. I was told the other day that someone was “Never happy, but it’s not their fault because nothing ‘happy’ ever happens to them”.  Here is when a slight change in perception can make all the difference.  Going back to that adventurous toddler, when we are young, we seek out happiness, we don’t just sit in our cribs and wait for it to ‘happen to us’ much to the chagrin of our parents.  When we grow older, however, lots of us just sit in the house and watch tv waiting for something happy to happen.  Here is when a good definition of what happy means to you would certainly help.  While enjoying a cup of coffee at the local Starbucks with a group of friends the other day, I asked them what would make them happy. There were two very different kinds of happiness expressed.  There was what I shall call ‘high excitement’ happiness. The “brand new sports car” “winning the lottery” “night in Vegas” to the ‘low excitement’ variety, “having the dishes done” “a good book and a bottle of wine” “a nice long walk in the woods with my dog”.  Although these answers are very different, they both work for the people who said them. So I asked, why are you not working toward saving for that trip to Vegas? How about working with you spouse to schedule some time alone for a book and a glass of wine.  Sometimes we forget a little pursuing on our behalf, and a change in perspective can make all the difference. Plus, let’s be honest, we all deserve it! Have an amazing day my friends!

THINK…BACKWARDS…

So often I hear people say, “I’m in such a bad mood and I don’t even know why” I must confess to having felt that way before.  This can be a rather perfect scenario for being happy.  Now you may be wondering if I have completely lost my mind.  While that has yet to be determined, at least let me explain my last statement.  When it comes to adding more joy to your life, as with any worthwhile goal, one of the greatest challenges lies in just knowing how.  Let’s face it, if there was a simple step by step plan to a happy life, wouldn’t we all follow it?  One of the greatest challenges I have had in both putting together both this website and my book is people are different.  What makes one person happy, well it may not work for the next person.  So how can we discover what truly makes us happy and develop a formula to continually accomplish that?  I have two suggestions and they are complete opposites and involve thinking backwards. Now before I loose everyone completely, let’s take a step back.  Here is the first method. Even in the darkest of lives there are moments if not days when things just seem to be going your way.  Think back have you ever had one of those days where you are just happy with the world?  Here is a suggestion, try retracing your steps.  What do I mean?  Simple, start from how you are feeling and work back through your day.  Perhaps you had completed a project you were working on?  Maybe you brought a smile to the face of a friend or even a complete stranger.  Maybe you just finished listening to one of your favorite songs on the radio, or working out.  It will be different for everyone, and there may be a few things in there that just seem kind of crazy, but if they lead you to happiness…who cares!  The point here is to look at what makes up a great day for you.  Perhaps write them down on a list, or in a person journal (more on that in later in the week).  Ok, so perhaps you haven’t had one of those days in a while? Maybe you can’t remember what made you so happy, or just want to enjoy the feeling without trying to figure it out. Fair enough.  Even if you find yourself having a miserable day, it is cause to get excited!  Why would feeling miserable be anything to be excited about you may ask.  This is why, it works the same way as being happy.  If you’re having a bad day, stop and think about all the things that transpired to bring you to that point.  Make a list of those things too.  Not only will you come up with a list of things you would do well to eliminate from your life, but if you look at the opposite of those things, you have the seeds for what will make you happy.  So even knowing what you dislike can be a very healthy thing.  If you were to say, I dislike all the negative people I run into.  You will know limiting your exposure to negative people might be something you wish to work on.  You may also phrase it as “adding more positive people to my life would make it better”.  So as this week continues, try thinking backwards and form a plan for your own happiness.  A plan that would be as unique as the person writing it!

THE POWER OF ONE…

I am a big fan of simple random acts of kindness.  I am also a fan of surrounding myself with positive books, cds and other inspirational items to be enjoyed at any given moment.  That is why I am happy to tell you about the book ‘The Power of One’ by Steve Maraboli.  In this fabulous book there is simply 365 things to try to bring kindness to the world.  Presumably one per day of the year.  Of course you could do more than one a day, or do one a week.  The important point here is that there are several good ideas for bringing kindness to others.  If you are unable to find or afford this book, fear not, I am going to be sharing a few of these ideas in the coming days.  I do recommend picking up a copy of you are able to as it is also sprinkled with great uplifting quotes and inspiration.  The principle the book is based on is ‘one kind gesture, one person at a time, one day at a time’  It may seem like a small idea until you realize how many ‘ones’ you see every day.  Imagine if every person you saw on any given day would do just one kind thing and you can begin to get an appreciation for the power of this idea.  Speaking of ideas it may also be fun to form a list of your own ideas. Simple ideas of selfless kindness you can do for others.  You’ll be amazed at the power of one, especially when you realize the one is you.

HOW DO I BEGIN??

Confession time.  I have a terrible flaw. When beginning any project I tend to think ten steps in advance.  I worry about what will happen months, sometimes years down the road.  On several occasions this overwhelms me to the point I fail to even begin.  On my road to self discovery I am learning to address and understand that as time goes on.  In fact, had I not this blog would not exist.  Which, some of you tell me would not be a good thing and I thank you for that.

The point of this confession? Is that I can understand when people tell me that in today’s world it just seems to difficult to achieve, much less maintain a positive outlook. What do they do about all the crabby people they encounter(more on that in another post) or how do they balance being informed without subjecting themselves to the negativity of their local paper or the evening news (also a subject to be addressed later this week) “It seems just to hard and hopeless I don’t even know where to begin” one lady recently told me.  Well, thanks to some wise words from a dear old friend I was reminded of a great place that makes it fun and easy to start.  One of my favorite books I have read in the last few years. Don’t worry for those of you who do not like to read it is also available on audio book. Even better, there is also a dvd! What is the title of this collection? “The Secret” I’m sure several of you have heard about it, and some of you may have not. personally if you can I recommend picking up all three as there is something to be gained from each different format. If you are not sure, or do not have the time or funds to dedicate to all three I strongly suggest starting with the movie.  Imagine sitting down with a big bowl of popcorn, or your other favorite snack, putting in dvd, relaxing on your couch and in a mere two hours you can be on your way to beginning a more positive life.  Now the movie is more about the law of attraction, but once you watch it you can see how close the topics of the law of attraction and living a positive life are connected. It also does a fine job of explaining why feeling good is so important and offers suggestions to help you to that end.  I encourage you to watch it with at least one other person if you are able as it could become a fun and interesting conversation for years to follow. If you are unable to find a friend to watch it with you feel free to discuss it here with myself or other followers of this site as we are all here to help each other on the path.