2 PART SUCCESS FORMULA 🙌

When pursuing success, many of us can overcomplicate things. The simple formula outlined above will get us wherever we want to go. It all starts with discipline. You must be able to say ‘no’ to the things that take you further from your goal and ‘yes’ to the things that bring you closer. That can be very difficult when that warm slice of pizza takes you further away, and going out in the cold to go to the gym is what brings you closer. It takes a strong will to be able to do this. As simple as it is, it is not easy.

The second part is even tougher patience, or consistency, which means doing the discipline over and over again. Even when you do not feel like it. Even when you do not see any signs that it is not working. That is how we improve. Let us say you are trying to improve your relationship. You are putting in the effort. Working on becoming a better listener. You are being more romantic. Still, your partner seems not to appreciate your efforts. It can be tempted to think they are not working and go back to having nightly shouting matches. What you may not know is that they are not fully able to trust your actions as genuine. Maybe they are working through their own feelings. The possibilities are endless really.

Being disciplined is hard. Being patient and working consistently may be even more difficult. You must know if you stick with these two actions, they will take you anywhere you want to go. The timing may be longer than you would like, but get there you will. Even if you seem to face setback after setback, that is all part of the journey. The more you get out of the way, the closer you are to achieving your goal. Write or print out this formula. Put it up somewhere you will see it daily. Work on your patience and your discipline. They will be the tools you need to build a successful life.

IT SAYS A LOT ABOUT YOU

Have you ever given much thought about how you make others feel? It is my mission in life to leave the world a better place than I found it. When Margie and I DJ together, I tell her my three goals with everyone who walks in the door is to have them laugh, feel a little bit better about themselves then when they walked in. If it is a couple, I want them to be just that little more in love with each other when they leave us. To me, making someone feel good is one of the best rewards in life. How about you?

In a world where it seems everyone is trying to be heard, how many of us are listening to each other? Sarcasm seems to be the order of the day. People try to get a laugh, often at the expense of other people’s feelings. Many people lack the basic refinement skills. Do you consider how what you are going to say may affect another person? If you do, is it to uplift, empower and encourage them? Can you imagine if we all made that our goal? Today, think of how your conversation will affect those you share it with. Do your best to lighten the load of all of those you encounter. I would love to hear a story about how someone made your day!

DEPRIVATION LEADS TO JOY 😊

This phrase may seem counterintuitive. With many observing Lent, I thought discussing fasting and sacrifice would be prudent. Many people fail to see the point of doing without. Aside from the spiritual benefits, there are some great self-improvement benefits as well. We will look at a major one that may have you rethinking how you look at giving up things.

I use the analogy of being stranded in the desert. You have no food, very little water. It is hot during the day and cold at night. In a very short time, things can get dangerous. Let’s imagine you make it  3 days and are suddenly rescued. All your rescuer had with them is water and saltine crackers. I can tell you, that will be one of the best meals you have ever had.

If I were to offer you those same two items at an “all you can eat buffet” How much would you enjoy them? For most of us in the industrialized world life is pretty much an all– you-can-eat buffet. We have a roof over our heads, clean running water, food and a place to sleep. We don’t think of these as luxurious, but take any of them away for even a day and our opinion would certainly change.

That is why fasting different things for a period helps increase our appreciation for them. This could include eating sugar,drinking coffee, or even your spouse. There is great truth to the saying, “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” I can personally attest to this. When I walk through the door after a hard days work, my lovely Margie is that much more beautiful than when I left her that morning.

How about you? Is there something you could try doing without to renew your feelings of appreciation for it?

HOW IS YOUR BALANCE? ⚖️

A quick reminder to create a balance in your life. We hear a lot about work/ life balance. We also hear a lot about how important it is to hustle, or grind. Then, we are also told how important it is to practice self-care and focus on creating joy in our life.

Which one of these is true? I believe they all are. You must have work life balance. That doesn’t always mean things will be 50/50. Some days you might have to work more. Some days are there to relax. Just make sure you have an ample supply of both.

Even on the days that have focused effort, make sure you are grateful and happy for how far you have come. You can both be satisfied with your life so far while still wanting more. Remember, without enough balance, anything just falls down. Life is the same way.

WHAT DO YOU SAY? 😟

Last post we talked about sending out messages of love and encouragement. Many people asked the same question, “Neil, I would love to send out a message, but what do I say?“ It seems we are not used to sending out messages like this. It may even seem awkward at first. With practice, it will become easier and your words will become more impactful.

Back to the original question. What do we say in a message of love and encouragement? A good start is to ask yourself what would make you happy to hear from a friend. A safe bet is always gratitude and appreciation. Telling someone how much they mean to you and why is one of the best messages you can deliver.

Above are some examples of inspiring messages you could send. These are just to get you thinking. They can be tailored to your specific person. Another fun idea is to reflect on a fun memory the two of you share. It could be a vacation you took together, a nice dinner you shared or simply a cup of coffee and conversation you enjoyed. Positively reflecting on that could be enjoyable for both of you.

How about you? Do you have any suggestions on good messages to send? By sharing our ideas with each other we inspire a revolution of love and encouragement!

HOW DO YOU SEND IT?

Isn’t it great when you receive some good news first thing in the morning? Maybe it is a phone call from a friend? A text from a loved one, or a greeting card in the mail? With modern technology, coupled with old-fashioned ideas, there are so many ways to send love.

Why bother sending love? In a world that seems to get crazier by the minute, sending someone some loving thoughts becomes a gift greater than ever. When you are sending thoughts to encourage, uplift and inspire someone, you are strengthening that relationship. Can you imagine how your life would change if you would send out one loving thought a day? That would be 365 loving messages in a year!

Sending love can take a few seconds if it is a text, to a few minutes for a phone call or a greeting card. I suggest picking up a pack of cards and a book of stamps so you are prepared when the mood strikes. You will spend less then a half hour doing this in a week, yet you will drastically improve both your life and that of the recipient.

In my upcoming fourth book, I go into greater detail about how to do this and the benefits you will receive. I would love to hear about ways you send out love. Who knows, they may even make it into my next book! This week, try sending out at least one loving message a day of one kind or another. See the change it makes.

CELEBRATE YOUR WOMEN TODAY!!🤵‍♀

Today is international women’s day! Time to celebrate all of those amazing ladies in your life. It can be family, spouse, friends, best friends, soul friends or any special woman in your life. I have been blessed to surround myself with so many smart, creative and wonderful women who have made my life better. In going to take a second to celebrate just a few, but know there are so many more and i appreciate you all!

First, in the picture above is my mother. Mothers are so important it only makes sense to celebrate them as often as we can. My mother and I do a great many things together. We go for walks, coffee and do the occasional 5k. She also gives me feedback on my writing! I’m very grateful to have her.

There is of course Margie, the love of my life. I could, and have done an entire post about all of the amazing things she brings to my life. On top of that, she is an amazing mother herself. Choosing the right partner can make all of the difference in life. That is why I am so excited to have her become Mrs. Neil next year!

Above are some truly amazing women. My sister Michelle! Margie’s daughter Siraya with whom she has started a business. My good friends Lisa, Sara,Jenny and my soul friend Shannon! All of which have added a lot to my life.

Special shout out to the wonderful women who read this blog. I would love to hear from you and where you are from. Feel free to show your pride in the comments below. Don’t forget to give appreciation to the women in your life today. I would suggest continuing it every day!

LITTLE THINGS MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE

I love little messages that make a big difference. Here was the license plate on the car in front of me. What a great reminder to be kind. While we are driving, this can be a vital reminder.

What kind of small things can you think of that would make a big difference? Where are good places to place a message? What are some messages you can think of to share? I would love to hear all your answers in the comments below.

YOU ARE TRYING TO WIN AT THE WRONG GAME! 🎮

How many hours do you spend on video games in a week? How much time playing solitaire or doing crossword puzzles? What do you achieve by getting better at these? How about increasing your income? How about spending time to look better in comparison to others or for society at large? When you think about it, most of our lives are spent in one or more of these endeavors. While I am sure all of them have their redeeming qualities, we should be focused on winning a different game – the inner game.

What I mean by the inner game, is mastering our thoughts and our attitude. When you stop and think about it, life is truly an inner game. The quality of our life, is the quality of our thoughts and emotions. If you are someone who sees what is wrong in life and generally feels angry towards the world and you win the lottery what will happen? You will be rich and…angry. If you can maintain a positive attitude despite outside circumstances, you have true power. Life, or other people and circumstances, will not be able to bring you down.

As you can see, this is not a new thought. Controlling your mind means that you are taking back control of your life. Not being subject to the whim of outside circumstances. Life has it’s ups and downs. Your mind and emotions do not have to. This is a lifelong journey. Much like physical fitness, mental fitness requires daily maintenance. Unfortunately, you do not workout one time and stay in shape forever. Same with gaining control over your mind and emotions. We slip up and act and say things when we are angry that we later regret. Can you see how even doing that less would make your life better?

How can we improve the quality of our thoughts, and thus the quality of our life? There are many options. I am still learning some myself. One of them is to develop an attitude of gratitude. Finding reasons to be grateful even when it seems impossible to do so will make your life amazing. Finding the opportunities in challenges. Some people just see a pile of manure, some people see fertilizer. Next time your life seems like a pile of the stuff that comes out the backside of an animal, ask yourself, “How can I use this to grow from?” Countless musicians, authors and artists have used the worst pain in their lives to create some of their best work. Why can’t you do the same? Also, look for other meanings in life. We can find ourself looking for the worst on occasion. Begin to train your mind to look for the best!

All of these suggestions can dramatically improve the quality of your thoughts and your life. If you would like more ideas to improve your life, feel free to pick up one, or all, of my books! Just search “Neil Panosian” on Amazon. Feel free to share what makes the difference for you in your thoughts and emotions in the comments below.

THIS IS YOUR REMINDER ❗️

It can be tough to remember that we are all awesome. It is the middle of the week and the grind might be starting to get to us, but do not let that stop you from looking in the mirror and seeing how amazing you are! There is something that is valuable in all of us. Some are good listeners. Others are good conversationalists. Many people have a great smile that is contagious. You could be smart. You could be funny. You could be a great cook or baker. Whatever it is that is awesome about you, do not let it go unnoticed. This is especially true when it comes to the person in the mirror.

In life, and in the world at large, it can be so easy to feel down about ourselves. We are in our own head 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It is so important to make sure that it is a nice place to be. This can be done by reading something inspirational (hint, you are doing so right now), it can be doing something nice for someone else, but it should also include reminding ourselves how awesome we are. It works even better to have friends in our life that also remind us. It helps to be that person for others as well.