ONE OF THE PUREST FORMS OF LOVE ❤️

This post could have been titled “Secret to an amazing relationship”. That is what this quote is. A truly great relationship is not just about intensity, but longevity. That may seem painfully obvious, but it is worth saying here in black and white. Even if a relationship has the burning passion of a bonfire, what good is that passion if it burns out rather quickly? Of course it would be great to have a passionate relationship that lasts for a very long time, if not forever. The million dollar question is how to do that.

Consideration is one of the very important tools you can use to give your relationship longevity. Being able to look at a situation, and consider its ramifications, from your partner’s point of view is a priceless skill. It is true that we will never know with 100% certainty how something will affect our partner, friend or coworker. What we can do is use the tools and strategies at our disposal to be able to have an educated and informed thought on the matter.

What tools and strategies will allow you to best be able to consider the other party’s feelings and how the situation may affect them? There are a few big ones I would advocate putting into practice. The first one is active listening. When the other party is venting about something that upsets them, pay attention. When they mention what would bring them joy, pay attention. If you ever have a question about the matter, do not assume. Asking questions for clarity is part of active listening. Listening with the purpose of learning and understanding is also part of active listening. If you go into a conversation with a plan of learning more about the other person, you are more likely to be successful with it.

The other aspect that can really help you better consider another party’s position on a matter is having meaningful dialogue. Many people call this “Having the hard conversations”. They may seem like something you may not want to do, but being able to know where someone stands on a difficult issue prior to that issue occurring, is a big advantage. Begin the conversation by letting them know you are asking because you want to know how best to act should that situation come up. Make it clear you are interested in their feelings and the health of the relationship between both of you. When they do tell you how they feel, or where they stand on a certain issue, accept it without judgement. Remember you are not trying to get them to think like you, just understand how they think.

Using these tools and strategies your relationships will stand a lot better chance of succeeding. When you show consideration for another, it demonstrates that you value them as a person and their roll in your life. If you are wrong in your estimation of how a situation may affect them, or how they feel about it, learn from that too. Before long, all of your relationships will start to improve.

NEVER BE ASHAMED

Today we are celebrating 1250 days in a row we have met here to discuss tools and strategies for success and living an amazing life. Hopefully, today’s post will inspire you and assist you in both of these endeavors. It is about a subject that many struggle with, including those who sit in powerful positions. That is the art, and ability to admit we are wrong.

Admitting we are wrong is never an easy thing to do. It does not feel good. We fear that it makes us look unintelligent or at the very least, not as impressive in someone else’s eyes. The quote above may help us to look at admitting we are wrong in a different light. It not only shows that you are capable of learning and adding to your intellect as Mr. Swift noted, but I think there are a few more things that admitting we are wrong actually do for us. Let us take a look at a few of them below.

Have you ever encountered one of those people who are totally incapable of admitting they are wrong? They come across as arrogant and it actually makes them look fragile. It takes a good deal of self-confidence to admit fault. It shows a certain vulnerability and humbleness. In the case of disagreements in our personal relationships, I think it shows that we are more committed to a solution and solving a problem than being right. It also demonstrates that you are capable of considering the other persons feelings and point of view.

With all of these great traits to be shown by being wrong, we should never be afraid of admitting it. Something to keep in mind is how you handle it when someone admits they are wrong to you. Do you hold it over them? Do you see the traits we mentioned above? How you handle someone else’s mistakes will go a long way in determining how they will handle yours. Show appreciation for them being brave enough to admit their mistake to you. Be thankful you are not with someone who never admits they are wrong.

IT IS HUMP DAY. KEEP WORKING!

We work so hard on our goals. We work hard on our health. If we are smart, we work very hard on our relationships. Still, there is one thing that we often skip working on. The irony is that by working on improving this one thing, we will improve on everything else in our life.

That one thing is ourselves! When was the last time you sat down and thought of ways you could improve? Better yet, when was the last time you came up with a concrete plan to do so? With New Years right around the corner, let’s do more than come up with random wishes to improve our life. Let us come up with a measurable plan to do so. It will not only improve ourselves, it will improve our life!

TIME TO CELEBRATE!

Today, Margie and I will be attending the “Best of Milwaukee” awards ceremony. The bakery she owns with her daughter was nominated for 3 different awards. I cannot tell you how proud I am. They work so hard and deserve the recognition. Being an unpaid employee of said bakery, I get to go along to the ceremony. Our DJ show also nominated for best in Milwaukee. We are so thankful for our supporters in every area.

Although this party will be great from a personal level, it is about so much more than that. It is a celebration of local businesses and people who make a difference in the community. Not only is that vitally important, but the votes were cast by members of that community. Where celebration and involvement come together, that leads to a closer and stronger community. Make sure you take the time to celebrate the people who have positively impacted you and your community. That can be filling out a survey for the business online, taking the time to show appreciation for an employee during the busy holiday season or maybe a positive post about the business on your social media account. All of these do not cost you a single penny, but can mean the world to a business or stressed out employee.

When we celebrate and honor each other, all of us our winners.

UNDERSTAND YOUR POWER

New month, better attitude! So many people underestimate the power they hold in their own lives. This picture above gives us three powerful things to think about. Let us take them one at a time. By the time we are done exploring and examining it, we will have some new tools, strategies and powers we can use to positively impact our lives. Sound good? Let us get to it!

The first one is one of my favorites! The power of our words. This is one area that people overlook or do not think is as powerful as it is. Do not take my word for it. This is backed by science. Dr. Masaru Emoto did some amazing experiments using the effects of words on water. He showed that when water was exposed to words such as hate, anger and the emotions behind it, the molecules became fractured and deformed. However, when exposed to words like love, peace and the emotions behind it, they formed perfect molecules. You may think, “So a guy yelling at water made it deformed. What does that have to do with me?” Your body is roughly 50 to 60% water! If you change the molecules in 60% of your body, how will could that not affect you? This can be a negative cliche’ you recite by force of habit. It can be overreacting when you are ill. Many of us focus on what is wrong and what we lack in our life. You can see, from a scientific standpoint, how this can affect our physical well-being.

Next is the power of our thoughts. According to research, the average individual thinks over 60,000 thoughts a day. Driving in the recent snow storm, it appears I live in a city with many below average people, but I digress. Further research states that over 80% of what we think on a daily basis is negative and 95% of it is repeat thoughts from the day before. Can you imagine hanging around with someone who talks negative 80% of the time? What if that same person says tells you 95% of that same stuff everyday? How long do you think you would hang out with them? Ironically, that is what is occurring in our own heads! Most of this occurs without us paying much attention. What we think will have a great impact on what do and are willing to try. That has a great impact on our life!

Lastly, is the power of our presence. How many of us tolerate being places we are not tolerated or at the very least, not appreciated? This is one I have to remind myself of often. There is something to be said for making compromise for the ones we love, but it should not come at the cost of our own peace.

For this last month of the year, take control of your words, your thoughts and your presence. See what a difference it will make in your own life. See how much power you hold to positively impact your life.

IT IS ABOUT MORE THAN THE MONEY

This is exactly what it was like in my neighborhood yesterday. It also nicely sums up my opinion on snow and winter. We might even want to add a word after ‘this’. The sad part was it was also what they call “Small business Saturday”. You are supposed to support locally owned businesses. It helps support those who support the community by giving them your business. It is about much more than just helping Bob or Betty with their business.

Did you know that roughly 50% of people are employed by small businesses? That means you are helping half of the people and their families by shopping at a local business. Not to mention the heart and soul that small business owners bring to a community that large corporations usually lack.

It was unfortunate that there was a terrible snow storm where I live on this day. We still have many days left before the holidays and I am sure you have one or two people you need to shop for. I encourage you to do so at a small business. You will not only get a far better gift, but your purchase will be an investment in the community. It is a win/win situation. This should not be limited to the holidays. Supporting small businesses should be a yearlong endeavor. Next time you have a purchase to make, consider doing so at a small business.

STAY SAFE

Just a quick reminder as we go through a crazy snow storm here at Secret2anamazinglife.com, that you should always remember to be safe this holiday season. We will be back tomorrow with a more complete post

HOW TO MAKE LIFE CONSISTENTLY AMAZING

We will get to why this question is indeed one of the most important questions in just a minute. First, I would like to share with you an event that got me thinking about this. A gentleman I see occasionally at my day job paid me one of the most unique, but meaningful compliments. He told me what he most admired about me was my consistency of character. How despite outside circumstances, I remain upbeat and treat everyone I meet with kindness and compassion. I would love to tell you this is true all of the time, but it is not. It is true enough that a gent would notice and compliment me on it. So what is my secret? How do I remain upbeat and always treat others kindly? How can I do this despite what my outside circumstances are? More importantly, how can you manage to do this as well?

The first step is to answer what good old Albert said was the most important question. Is the universe a friendly place? Here is the tricky answer. Whatever we decide the answer is, we can find corresponding evidence for it. If we look for examples that the universe is a terrible place with people only out for themselves, there is no shortage of that. If, however, we are brave enough to believe the universe is a wonderful place with people showing kindness and compassion towards others, we will find that too. We may have to look a little harder as that kind of news does not sell as well. They are both there. I am here to tell you life will be much more rewarding and joyous if you decide the universe is a wonderful place to be.

One good way to do this is to find a guiding quote that speaks to you in that regard. Although not an overly religious person, that quote from the bible is one of my favorites. Whether you are religious, spiritual or not, find one that speaks to you. If you decide that the universe is is a friendly place, than even when things seem to be going sideways, you will understand that it is ultimately for a good purpose. This may sound like a bunch of B.S., and it is. Belief system that is. If your belief system is that the world is generally a good place, you will understand if the dark and the challenges bring their own blessings.

Does that mean your life will suddenly be rainbows and unicorns? Of course not. You will, however, begin to see the gifts that challenges bring. You will find yourself saying things like, “Boy this person is testing my patience. By testing my patience, it will help me strengthen it.” This could be to yourself or out loud. By developing this mindset you will be able to be more consistent in how you are living your life. This not only can apply to the overall purpose of your life, but to specific areas as well.

Recently, a friend mentioned how they struggled to keep a positive attitude about the business they started. When you are excited about your business and nobody seems to come through the door, how do you stay excited? That is a challenge. If you have a firm belief in what you do and why you are doing it, view those ‘down’ times as a test of your dedication to your business and an opportunity to learn different ways to attract customers and improve on that which you are now doing. My third book did not go over nearly as well as I had hoped. Instead of viewing myself as a failed author, I took that opportunity to examine how I bring my message to people, how I promote my books and what I could do better with my upcoming fourth book.

The secret to a consistently amazing life is to decide that your universe is a friendly place, or whatever goal you are pursuing is worthwhile. If that is the case, then how could anything not be working towards your greater good? Put both the victories as well as the challenges to work for you. The more you do this, the more life will be amazing and the easier it will be to be consistent in all you do and who you are.

THE MAGIC THANKSGIVING FORMULA

These three words, in this order, have become almost cliche. We see them just about everywhere. On signs, dish towels, t-shirts and numerous other locations. What we may fail to realize, is these three words, so often in front of us, are actually a formula for an amazing life. They are steps listing how to live a life of inner peace, abundance and joy. In only three words, we can learn a great way to live! Let us take a little deeper dive.

Today in the United States, we celebrate Thanksgiving. A holiday in which we are supposed to focus on all we have to be thankful for. Sadly, it seems to get lost with all of the excitement of Halloween and Christmas. In this humble holiday is the secret to an amazing life. The word ‘thankful’ is most often associated with feeling and showing appreciation for what is wonderful in our lives. That is the first step in positively transforming our lives. Change your focus from what you lack in your life to everything you have. This simple change will reduce your stress, increase your joy and help you realize how wonderful and abundant you have it. What better day to start than on a holiday that is all about being thankful?

Many people think that ‘thankful’ and ‘grateful’ are the same. They do differ in a very important way. It is this step that will put us on the path to living an amazing life. While ‘thankful’ is feeling appreciation for all the good we have in our life, ‘grateful’ is extending our appreciation for everything and everyone in our life. Even those who at first glance may not seem to be something good. When you are grateful, you appreciate both the valleys as well as the peaks of life. You understand that challenges often provide us just as much, if not more, to appreciate than the easy times. We grow more with challenges. Think of lifting weights. If you only lift easy weights, you will not get any stronger. It is in the heavy, or challenging weights, that we grow our muscles and become stronger. The same is true of our character, our inner peace and every aspect of our life. The challenges offer us a place to grow and strengthen our life. The easy and successful times allow us to celebrate, the challenges to grow. When we learn this, being grateful becomes a way of life. Either we win or we learn.

The last step in our equation is ‘blessed’. This is what happens when we learn to be both ‘thankful’ and ‘grateful’. We begin to notice how everything in life happens for us and not to us. When you learn to put both the accomplishments and challenges of life to work for you, than life is a never-ending fountain of blessings. Yes, even those moments that tear our hearts apart can end up being a blessing. It can teach us more in the pain than we could ever learn any other way. It can often teach us quicker than we care to learn. It can also provide us a credibility and ability to teach others going through similar struggles. We can use our pain and struggle to bless others. That, in itself, is a blessing.

Do you see how a simple formula can provide a dramatic shift in mindset. That, in turn, can give us a monumental shift in the trajectory of our life. It can alleviate a great deal of stress and provide us with a great deal more of hope and joy. Think of this formula as you go about your life. Not just today, but every day. Start by being thankful for all the good you have in your life. Really focus on that. Next, contemplate how you could be grateful for everything in your life. See the benefits even the pain and challenges give you. Before long you will walk around feeling blessed!

WE DID IT! EARLY AT THAT!

Never in my wildest dreams would I ever imagine that I would be writing a daily inspirational blog for over 13 years! What makes my heart so full of gratitude is that we seem to be growing our community and reaching more souls in more places. Still no Greenland, but we will get there. We are in over 200 countries and this year, as of this writing we have had over 28,000 views. That is the second most in 13 years! Even better is we have reached over 22,000 people. That is the most in 13 years.

My life’s mission is to leave the world a little better than I found it. Through sharing the tools and strategies I continue to learn, I believe I am doing just that. With all of your help, and lately with a lot of our friends in China, we will continue to grow and positively impact the lives of all of those we care about.

This blog was started on Thanksgiving in 2012. Gratitude is the one thing that will change not only our lives, but the world at large, quicker than anything else I know. Tomorrow we celebrate Thanksgiving here in the United States. While there are lots of things we need to improve, there are still a lot we have to be grateful for. I look forward to continuing to serve you and to increase engagement as we look forward to the coming year. With your help, 2026 can be our biggest and most impactful year yet!