No complex, thought-provoking post today. Just an encouragement to go out and do one awesome thing to make your week exciting. Go to work in a speedo. Plant a tree… in the break room. Greet the greeter at Walmart. Whatever makes you smile. What one awesome thing will you do today?
I consider myself a person with a good deal of empathy and who genuinely wants the best for others. When I see someone in a situation that is less than ideal, it breaks my heart. When I hear sirens racing to help someone I send a silent prayer for the well-being of parties on both sides of that siren. When I see someone stuck on the side of the road, I say with sincerity, “I hope you have a better day my friend.” As someone who has found themselves on the wrong side of a siren going to the hospital, and stuck on the side of the road, and once in a busy intersection, I can feel for these folks. This also holds true when I see people living a life that is less than they can. I see someone who is always drinking, I feel bad that they seem to be wasting a good deal of their life. When I see someone who exists in a constant state of anger, I feel bad that they will miss a lot of the joy life may hold.
I often feel for and pray for these people as well. Then it occurred to me. Just like sending a prayer for people on both sides of the siren, I need to pray for both people on the side of this situation. In my empathy, I am also doing a form of judging these people. I do not know what caused them to be in this situation. Maybe they have a right to be angry all the time? Maybe that person who is drinking is dealing with far more than they let on? It was then I began to realize I needed to wish that I would be blessed with a little more compassion. It was not my decision to decide what is the best life for anyone. Although it was done with a hope and desire for everyone to live their most amazing life, it was not my place. I realized, in some small way, I was taking the job of God. Then I began to pray for myself to have a great deal more understanding and compassion.
Have you found yourself harshly judging others? Even if we do it with a hope and desire that they may find a way to improve, we need to understand we do not, and will never, know their entire story. May we all wish the best for each other, but may we also do so with the greatest amount of compassion and understanding.
I eat a lot of crazy things. Most recently I tried a gummy bear brat. For those of you who may be unfamiliar, that is a sausage made with gummy bears on the inside as well as topped with gummy bears. This is served on a flavored bun with honey mustard. If we are being honest, it wasn’t that great. The point being, I love to try new and different things. One of those items happened to be anchovies. You know, the little fish they put on pizza. I am a fan of herring, tuna and other such fish. When a friend of mine offered me a piece of pizza (my favorite food) and told me it had anchovies on it, I did not bat an eye. My thought was more how interested I was to try something new. It really did not taste very bad. I actually kind of liked it. I remember thinking how exciting it was to find a new pizza topping I enjoyed.
Then it happened…I got violently sick. It took a while of thinking and one more experience with these little fish, to realize that they just do not agree with me. Oddly enough, I can have ceaser dressing which has anchovies in it. Not sure how that works. You may be wondering what this all has to do with living an amazing life. I know I would be if I was reading this. Here is a quote I heard the other day that reminded me of both this situation and how it relates to life. “Some things can taste good on the lips in the moment, but be bitter in the belly later on.” You see, I liked the taste of anchovies, but once they started swimming in my stomach, my stomach started swimming.
The same can hold true in life. Eating that doughnut may feel good in the moment, but the guilt you feel later will not. Not to mention the effects of too many doughnuts in the long term is not good. How about telling someone off? It certainly can feel good in the moment, but later on? You may end of feeling terrible about some of the things you said. There could be damage to the relationship that is beyond repair. Some things taste good on the lips in the moment, but are bitter in the belly later on. In a world of instant gratification, it is not that common to think long term. As we have seen in the 3 mentioned examples, that can really prevent us from living an amazing life. Can you think of anything that tastes good on your lips in the moment, but is bitter in your belly later on?
Every morning I listen to something motivational. I recently downloaded an app to my phone called Fresh Motivation. I like it because it allows you to listen to a host of motivational videos while you have a black screen on your phone. This allows you to save battery life. Most of these videos have a mix of different people speaking. This morning I heard a video that featured Jim Rohn. If you have not listened to Mr. Rohn, I suggest you check him out. You could even do it with the free app I mentioned earlier.
In this particular video, he said something that really struck me, and I wanted to share it with you. The quote I remember was, “It is not the hours you put in. It is what you put in the hours.” He said a lot of people say “I am not getting anything done, but I am so busy.” To which he said he asked, “Doing what?” At my work we have people who seem to run around like their pants are on fire, but they seem to make very little progress, or are always behind. Then, we have people who are the opposite. They seem to look like they are barely working, but accomplish many times more than the people who are running around are doing.
How about you? Are there times when you feel like you are working like crazy and not getting anything done? You must ask yourself, what are you putting in the hours that you are putting in? Are they full of distractions? You can work in the yard cutting grass for hours, but if that is also filled with stopping to text friends or watch amusing YouTube videos, you may find yourself with a half mown yard. Same in the gym. I see people who spend more time exercising their thumb muscles on their phone, than their other muscles on the machines they are sitting on.
How do we remedy this problem? There are countless programs and books on ways to increase productivity. They certainly would be worth checking out. One simple idea to start with is to record everything you do, and the time it takes, for an entire day. Something like this…
woke up at 7am
hit snooze until 710
brushed teeth from 711 to 715
made coffee from 715 to 717
Account for every single minute and every activity of your day. If you are mowing the lawn and you stope to text a friend or watch a video, record that. Be honest with yourself. There is no point in saying ‘cut lawn from noon to 2pm’ if really you watched YouTube from 12:05 to 12:15, surfed Facebook from 12:30 to 12:45, and had a text conversation with Betty from 1:07 to 1:13. Be honest about what you spend your time on. Nobody will see this but you. If you are truly looking to increase your productivity and reduce your stress, this honest evaluation will go a long way in accomplishing that.
This may also have the added bonus of showing when you are most productive. This way you can learn when to schedule most of your projects you are working on. Try this for a week and you will be surprised to learn how much time you spend on foolish things and how easy it would be to improve your efforts.
This weekend, keep it simple. Fill your heart with gratitude and appreciation. The 3 feelings of gratitude. 1.) Gratitude for everything you’ve been given in your life. 2) Gratitude for everything your currently have in your life. 3) Gratitude for all the blessings on their way.
Keep your focus on being grateful this weekend and watch your heart fill with joy.
As Margie can testify, I am terrible at this. When people asked how my recent vacation was, I answer, “Not as productive as I would have liked.” Who really wants their vacation to be productive? I guess that would be me. I wanted to have my third book out by now, wanted to have my podcast up and running. Neither of those have been completed.
If there is a skill I am lacking, it is how to relax properly. I have 62 of the 102 typed pages edited for my new book. I also set up and did the cover art for my upcoming podcast. I have to realize not every day you can move mountains. So should you. The days on the couch can often be necessary for recovery and recharging. Take them, just don’t take too many of them.
I must remind myself about the photo above. With 6, soon to be 7, jobs there is always something going on in my life. Add to that, time with a very sexy lady and my days are booked! Still, it is important to take time to unwind. Make sure you have both a productive and relaxing weekend.
This title may be a little misleading. I do not actually love pain. Especially in the moment. I am not sure anyone does. What I do feel is respect for pain. I know in pain and darkness is where some of the greatest growth happens. I was reminded of this late last week. It is fairly obvious when it comes to physical fitness. The pain you feel in your muscles is what proceeds the growth of new muscle. The pain of deprivation and self-sacrifice when you are improving your diet will lead to the growth of a healthier you. These are all pretty obvious situations. Sometimes pain is sneaky and the growth is not so easy to understand until you can look back.
Last week I had one of those sneaky moments. I am still not 100% sure why, but I am guessing a host of personal situations that occurred had me feeling down. It can be quite frustrating when you feel down and you just can’t put your finger on exactly why. I decided to get some writing done. I went to the local coffee shop and started to write some blogs. They felt a little dark, but they were very introspective. After I was done writing, it occurred to me that often this can be the result of me feeling in a funk. I get in my own head and really start thinking about my life and how I am living it. Then, I come up with some pretty interesting conclusions. Ones that would probably not have come to me if I was running around with a smile on my face and in my heart.
Many people assume that being happy 100% of the time should be a goal. I disagree. I think a little pain is good for us all. What we should try to do is limit the duration and frequency of that pain. On the other end of the spectrum, we should try to maximize the profitability of our pain. What I mean by that is we should try to get the most out of a painful situation. It can be tempting to wallow in self-pity or sadness. I know just as well as anyone how good that can feel. Here is a little secret, it doesn’t get you very far. Certainly, give those feelings their due, but then put them to work for you. Suffering the pain of regret after losing someone? Let it be the kick in the butt to be more loving to those you still have. Sad because the person you thought you would be with forever had a far shorter definition of the word than you did? Learn from that. Were there red flags you overlooked? Is there something you can improve about yourself?
Pain can suck. There is no way around that. What makes it ten times worse, is if you don’t get anything out of it. Imagine going to the gym once, feeling sore, waiting weeks until you feel better and then repeating it. Not only would you feel sore again, you would not be any closer to being in shape. The pain of losing a job for being late and then showing up 30 minutes after the start time for your new job. None of this would make sense. Put pain to work for you. Don’t let it run you!
It is Wednesday, hump day, the middle of the week. Whatever you choose to call it, many of us pause and evaluate the week at this point. Most of us, especially high achievers, tend to look at everything we have yet to accomplish. While this may be good for developing a plan of action and noting what time we have to complete projects, it may hinder their actual completion. How is this possible? The emotional state change that causes can have some very negative consequences.
The first thing this can do is make us feel overwhelmed. We were starting that new diet and only made it two days so far? We really have three more days to go? It was so hard not eating the doughnuts in the breakroom on Monday and Tuesday. How will we be able to make it the rest of the week? This can lead to a desire to just give up. If we flip that on its head and say to ourselves “I have already made it two days on the new diet! No doughnut can defeat me now!” We give ourselves momentum and praise our accomplishments.
The other thing that focusing on what has yet to be done can make us feel like a failure. This is very counterproductive. In the baby example, can you imagine yelling at your kid, “Would you stop that falling and give up already!” This is often what we do to ourselves. It can also be what we do to others when we are constantly pointing out where they fell short. It will only lead to them not wanting to press on. If, like we do with children learning to walk, we praise the little steps they complete, it will lead to them wanting to push on.
Today let us take a second and congratulate ourselves and each other on all that we have accomplished so far this week. Let us give a little encouragement for the rest of the week ahead. Not only to others, but to the one who lives between our own two ears.
In a world of adulting and Bill paying, sometimes you need to reconnect with the simple joys of life. Above is a picture of an alpaca. Animals can bring us a great amount of joy. Whether that is a family pet, going to the park to watch the birds, or even an alpaca at the state fair, Animals rarely fail to put a smile on our face!
Animals not your thing? Maybe you have an allergic issue that prevents you from enjoying them? Maybe you would just like to have another outlet to bring you joy? How about going back to simple childhood activities? In an age of cell phones and high resolution video games, it can be refreshing to pick up a crayon and draw a picture. That is just what my lovely lady is doing in the picture above! We, for some reason, feel we should leave these activities behind as we grow older. Truth is, as adults, we may need them more than ever!
What simple activity do you practice to bring you joy?
Many of us limit our exploration of nature to weekend hikes, or some even to a yearly vacation. There are many physical and psychological benefits to spending time in nature. This week, take a walk in a park. Spend some time reading in the woods. Spend some time with nature.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 