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HERE IS THE KEY 🔑

This is a very good secret to an amazing life. That is to catch yourself thinking negatively and toss in some gratitude and appreciation. It will not only dramatically improve the quality of your emotional state, but will change the way you start to view and interact with the world. Does that sound a little bold or over the top? Ask yourself this question. Do you treat people differently when you are feeling angry verses grateful? How about sad verses filled with joy? Even if this difference in treatment is not conscious, if we are being honest, most of us must agree that we do treat people differently based on our emotional state. You have more patience and are more forgiving if you are in a better mood. You are better able to view the positive side of a situation.

Again, we see that gratitude is the antidote to negativity. That is why the more processes to foster gratitude you have in your life, the better. When we are in a negative state, or at the very least going down that path, it can be hard to come up with something we appreciate. That is why doing so ahead of time is so vital. How do we now when ‘ahead of time’ is? We don’t. Our brains can pop up with a negative thought without a warning. That is why we should always be on the lookout for what we can be grateful for. We can do this is so many ways. Find one that works for you. Next, make sure to record those thoughts.

You can start a gratitude journal where you write down daily what you are grateful for. You can have an album of pictures in your phone of people, places and things that you are grateful for. You could even record positive affirmations of what you appreciate on your phone. That way, when negativity shows up, you do not have to think, you have something ready. Here is another secret. This will seem difficult, if not impossible, at first. The more you do it, however, the easier it will become. Before long, you will not only catch your negative thoughts quicker, but they will seem to come less often and they will be outnumbered by grateful thoughts!

A BIRD WITHOUT WINGS? 🐦

Salvador Dali, crazy talented artist. Check out that mustache! Here ol’ Sal makes a pretty good point. Many people think that improving yourself is just about learning more. It is actually a balance of learning more and putting that knowledge to use. We can learn all we want, but if we fail to act on it, well…we might as well not have learned it at all. I would not only say act, but act boldly. Many times we need to act to learn vital pieces of information. As the saying goes, you do not know what you do not know. Meaning, often when acting on knowledge you think is complete, you realize that a vital piece of that knowledge is missing.

One of the most “interesting” areas that this comes into play is in relationships. Whenever you are dealing with two human beings there will be unexpected events that crop up. This is not only to be expected, but can be one of the greatest opportunities for growth. When I learn something that is supposed to improve a relationship, I can’t wait to use it with the love of my life. It is often with Margie’s help that I learn a tweak that will add greatly to the tool or strategy that I just learned. When two people work together they multiply their efforts.

Acting on the knowledge you have gained will only add to that knowledge. The more you do anything the better you get at it. That is because you learn things along the way. Just as acting without knowledge (think of driving a car without knowing how) can be dangerous. It does little for us to learn something without putting it to use. I see many people who spend years researching the best way to lose weight. They would have been better to just start walking and learning along the way. Act with the knowledge you have now and build upon that knowledge as you move through life.

Lastly, make that action bold. If you are going to love, love boldly. If you are going to give, give boldly. The more intense the action, the greater the knowledge and results. Even if you discover that action is not right for you, this will be learned quicker if the action is bolder. Learning isn’t worth much if we do not couple that knowledge with action.

KEEP ONE AROUND

One of the great secrets to an amazing life is to set yourself up for success. Learn as many tools and strategies to improve your life and maintain a positive emotional state as you can. Never rely on just one strategy to get the job done. Just as a screwdriver would not work to saw a log in half, or a saw to put a screw in, different situations in life call for different tools.

One thing that will help is setting your environment up for success. In this endeavor, use the same approach. Engage as many tools and strategies as you are able. I have a daily inspirational calendar I read. There are also motivational pictures and quotes in my locker at work. We discussed having a ‘happy playlist’ of songs that inspire you at the ready. Another great idea is to keep pictures around that just make you smile. The picture above of the otter is a great example. I have many silly and adorable pictures of my beautiful lady that never fail to put a smile on my face. I would share one of them here, but I fear I may be sleeping on the porch then.

How about you? What tools and strategies do you use to keep a smile on your face and joy in your heart? Do you have any pictures that make you smile? Are they placed where you can see them every day? Share your ideas so that we may all be one step closer to an amazing life!

ENJOY IT NOW, BEFORE IT IS GONE 😮

I once heard someone say, “You are older than you have ever been and younger now than you will ever be again.” Sounds crazy, but if you ponder that, it is really true. How quickly can life be turned upside down? You could lose a physical ability you have today in an instant. A friend or relative could move away, or worse pass away. Every second is such a gift. Can you think back 10 years? What would you have done differently or wish you would have done? Realize the same will hold true 10 years from now. Live life to its fullest every second of every day.

I would love to hear some of your stories. What do you wish you would have done differently 10 years ago? What do you do to enjoy life in the present? What do you suggest for our readers that will help them enjoy their life more?

AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE ABOUT GRATITUDE 🙏

I have been waiting to have the time to sit down and write this post. Thank you for stopping in today at Secret2anamazinglife.com. Throughout our over 10 year run, the topic that comes up the most is gratitude. Some of you may even be rolling your eyes at the thought of yet another post about gratitude. The reason we post so much about this subject is that I firmly believe in order to change your life, you have to change your mindset. There is nothing that works with more speed and impact to change your mindset than gratitude.

In my 2 decades of work in the self-improvement field, I have shared this opinion to everyone who would listen. It is what changed my life for the better, and still does. If you use it, I promise it will do the same for you. What most people struggle with is believing that gratitude can do all of this, and how to use it in their own life. They think of people who are constantly preaching the gospel of gratitude as people who go through life ‘wearing rose-colored glasses’. That is not what true gratitude is about at all.

It is not believing that there is no weeds in the garden. Gratitude is realizing that in addition to the weeds, and sometimes in spite of them, wonderful plants and flowers bloom. It is also not just focusing on the plants and pretending there is no weeds. It is working on the weeds while caring for the plants. In case this metaphor is not perfectly clear, we will spell it out. The weeds are the challenges, or what is wrong in life. The plants and flowers represent what is right and good in our world. Just as a garden is rarely, if ever, free of weeds, our life is rarely if ever free of challenges. We must work on overcoming our challenges, while still being grateful for all that is good. You would not give up on a garden because there are a few weeds. You should not give up on life because there are challenges.

Developing an attitude of gratitude is one of the best things you can do for your life. It does not mean that you are denying or ignoring the challenges in life. You are making the bold stand that there is beauty in, and that life is worth while despite the challenges. It is often in the challenges that the true beauty and reasons to be grateful can be found.

THIS ONE IS IMPORTANT!

I love this thought. With life as busy as it is, many of the simple joys get pushed on the back burner. It is not only time to rediscover them, but to make a point of adding them into our life. These can be simple, inexpensive things that make us smile. Let me give you an example.

Whenever I go to a coffee shop, I’m there for one of two purposes. I’m either there to write. This could be the very blog you are now reading, or working on my next book. The second purpose is to connect and enjoy the company of others. After 23 years of being a bartender, my favorite place to meet friends is a coffee shop.

What does this have to do with simple joys? Those things do give me joy. What i forgot is the simple pleasure of a cup of coffee and a good book. Just relaxing and reading. Deadlines always looming, it makes it hard not to feel guilty about this simple pleasure. It is these simple pleasures that refresh our soul and allow us to face the world. What is your simple pleasure?

LIKE THE LOTUS 🪷

When the world around us tends to look darkness, perhaps it is is who need to be the light. We can be like the lotus in mud. A bit of beauty in an ugly world. When you find yourself in a negative situation, do not only look for the light, but think of ways in which you can be the light!

I would love to hear any of the personal examples you may have.

ACCEPT THE LITTLE GIFTS  🎁

It is often when we are down that we fail to appreciate, and sometimes even notice, the little gifts that life provides every day. This can be when we are hurting, when we are exhausted or in my case Monday mornings, when we are tired.

Most of you know already that going from being a DJ to my day job on Monday I get about 2 hours of sleep. It can be tough to look around and appreciate the Miracles of life when you are that tired. It is exactly that which will give us the energy and keep our vibration from slipping lower. Draining us physically, mentally and emotionally.

This past Monday serves as a good example. As I was driving to work, cursing the lack of sleep and energy I was feeling my favorite song came on the radio. Being it is not one of the 10 the are paid to play on repeat all day, in fact it is quite rare, made it stand out. I felt grateful.

It was also a wake up call to remind me to focus on what was working and good in my life instead of what was lacking. After over 20 years of working in self-improvement and with the law of attraction you would think I should know this. As stated earlier, being in a depleted state can make you forget what you know.

The great thing was after that initial noticing, I started to notice other things to appreciate. The great cup of coffee that not only tasted great but would help me wake up. The car that helped me get to work. Even the work I was going to as so many others are looking for work. Make sure you are always on the lookout for the little Miracles life sends you.

WHICH WILL YOU REMOVE? 🤔

Sometimes life is ‘addition by subtraction’. That is, there are things we have, or do, in our lives that make them worse. Is it an addiction to sugar? Maybe we are prone to gossip? Perhaps it is hanging with a crowd we just know are not good for us. Whatever the case, our lives would be better without them.

What we struggle with is the perception of these things. They are not just ‘bad habits’, they are literally stopping us from becoming all we can be! They are an internal enemy! We must fight to eliminate them from our life!

My suggestion is to think of one food, habit or person that you would be better off leaving in the past. Work on eliminating that from your life. I would love to hear what you are working on!

THE STRENGTH OF 1 COMES FROM 2 💪

Happy Mother’s Day to all of the mothers out there from us at Secret2anamazinglife.com. We begin, as it should be, with recognition to my mother. You can see both of us in the throw back photo above. Credit goes to her for raising yours truly. As a single parent that couldn’t have been easy. Having a child who would watch the news instead of Sesame Street also couldn’t have been easy. Despite all of this, I learned valuable lessons from my mother.

The skill of resilience. To keep on keeping on, as they say. To keep pushing when others may quit. To do so in a virtuous manner and not cut corners or cheat, even if you have an excuse to do so. The power of kindness and compassion towards others. I still recall all of the great memories we made serving at the local meal program. To turn towards your faith when times get rough. To have that belief that “everything will be OK” as she always says.

Then there is this cute mother, my Margie. She inspires me to be a better man, and loves me even when I fail to do so. She is not only an amazing mother in her own right, she also helped me overcome some of my own childish behavior.

She continues to demonstrate the love and concern she has for her children every day. She works hard to continue to grow and be a good example to them and makes me proud.

How lucky am I to have the influence and to share my life with 2 such amazing mothers? Remember to recognize all of the mothers you see today. The hard work and sacrifice of being a mother can only be paid with love and appreciation.