Just a reminder that in life, on any given day, we have the option to be grateful. It doesn’t matter how bad your situation is, or how much you would like it to be different. If we choose, and it is a choice, we can find what will allow us to feel grateful.
Even while striving to improve, it is vital to keep this in mind. Feeling stuck at your job, and would really like a new one? While you look and prepare, feel grateful 🙏 for having a job. Things not going well with someone at home? As you look to improve that relationship, be grateful you have someone to work with. Even the pain of losing someone we really love can make us realize how grateful we should feel for having loved so deeply.
This weekend, find that one thing, or a many things as you can, to be grateful for. Share some with the community here if you like. Then, just relax and really feel the gratitude for them. Get lost in it. Relish it. Have a great weekend my friends!😀
In life, there are certain things that we all go through. One of those things is change. We all face it in many areas of our life. When things are going great and we are happy, change can seem like a terrible thing. When we are struggling, change can seem to never come. Yet, come it will. No matter how certain things may seem, change will come. If the pandemic and the last few years of chaos have taught us anything, it is that things can change when we least expect it and do so quickly.
I hear a lot of people tell me, “Neil, I just don’t like change.” For anyone, that is only half true. You do not like change to things you know, like and are comfortable with. If there was something that caused you pain or inconvenience, you would not mind that changing at all. That is the first thing we must consider. Without change, none of the things we dislike would ever improve. That wouldn’t be too much fun would it? How about never getting a raise? We wouldn’t want our salary to change now would we? Never getting a new car? Wouldn’t want to change what we are driving. I think you get the point.
What about when it is something we like and are familiar with? We know how to do our job and do it well until some bigshot decides it should be done differently. Maybe that bigshot decides they don’t even need us doing the job anymore? Then we find ourselves out of the street. Not the type of change we enjoy. How about the change of someone we love passing? Probably the most painful change we have to endure. What do we do then? It takes a realization and a change in perception to deal with these changes. First, we must realize that change, like the law of gravity, doesn’t care if we like it or not. If we hate the law of gravity and throw a ball off of the roof, it will still go down, no matter how much we complain about the law of gravity. Same with change. It will always come, so complaining and getting upset will only cause us undue stress and wasted energy.
If change is not going to stop, and some of it really sucks, how can we still live an amazing life? Think of ourselves as a sailboat. What?! Yes, a sailboat. When a sailboat is trying to get from point A to point B and the wind changes, what does it do? Does it complain about the wind and say, “Well, I guess I am going in this other direction now.” I think you know the answer to that is no. What does it do? It adjusts the sails. Ah, there is the key to using change in our own life. Let us say, hypothetically of course, you are an author who wrote a book you hope will inspire a lot of people. You sell many copies and wait for the reviews to come in. Then you wait and wait some more. None come. Do you just say, “Well I guess that was a failure.” You could, or you can hire a PR firm and do your best to get yourself out there. You must adjust your sail. Maybe you have a job you thought you would retire from and the company goes out of business. You could complain about the change and tell everyone how it wasn’t your fault. Keep doing this and they will come and take your house away. You could also maybe go back to school, look for a job in a field you would enjoy more or find a job that better aligns with your purpose. Adjust your sail.
Change is constant for everyone. The better we learn to work with change instead of complaining about it, the more successful we will become. Think of your life as that sailboat. You are the captain. When the winds of life change, what are you going to do? Are you going to let your boat get tossed in the ocean of life, or are you going to grab hold of the helm and adjust your sail?
One of the most powerful forces in life is our identity. Whatever we think we are, we will not do anything to go against it. Even if we think that it will make our lives better. That is just how this crazy thing called a human works. If we tell everyone that we are a procrastinator, no matter how hard we try, we will always wait until the last minute to finish a project. If we say that we are an out of shape person, no diet or exercise program will work. There are very few things that we were born into that we cannot change. What keeps us stuck is the belief that our actions define who we are. What they really say is who we were.
To overcome this limiting pattern, all we have to do is change a few words. The language we use with others, and to a greater degree with ourselves, has a huge impact. Instead of saying that we are a procrastinator or out of shape, say we used to procrastinate or used to be unhealthy. This is a big difference. Our behaviors are not who we are, but what we do. We are not procrastination, we do procrastination. This may not seem to be a big deal on the surface, but to our subconscious mind, which runs about 90% of the show, it is a huge deal. If it feels we are doing anything against our identity, it will fight us tooth and nail. Better to change a few words and make that positive transition easier on ourselves.
Earlier in the year, we had a post that highlighted the importance of doing small things with a great deal of consistency. The example we used was doing 20 squats a day and the cumulative effect of doing so. After 1 day, you will not notice anything. Other than a little soreness, even after 1 week you might not notice much. After 30 days of doing squats, you are sure to notice the clothes fitting a little different and the reflection the mirror being a little more forgiving. If we are being honest, I didn’t do so good on the squats, but will get back at it for my yearly charity run
One of my goals this year was to have a blog a day for an entire year. As you can see in the picture above, we have made it 300 days straight. Actually, by the time you are reading this, it will be 303. As I have dedicated myself to bringing the world motivation and inspiration daily, my reward has been a growing global audience. This site has gained followers in several new countries. The amount of people viewing us daily has increased as well. Our presence on the great continent of Africa has nearly doubled. More people began following us in South America than ever. This includes in Peru, Brazil, Columbia and several other countries. This has happened in no small part because of the daily commitment of sharing these inspiring words.
What daily habits could you start today that will have a great impact on your life the rest of the year? Think the month of May is too late to start something new? Let me ask you how different you would feel if you did 20 squats a day for 7 months? Feel free to share your commitment with the community in the comments below.
Here are a few interesting facts that I have learned lately. On average, Americans spend between $244 and $313 on cosmetics…every month! The average global income is $9,733. The global cosmetics industry is valued at 571.10 billion! This is a lot of money to be spent in the quest to make us look better. Yet, most of these people do not invest the money, or the time, into the one thing that is sure to improve their appearance – their soul. How does working on your soul, or personality, make you more attractive? More to the point, how can we do it? Let us take a look.
The first thing to consider is what accessories you choose to wear. I am not talking about that expensive bracelet or purse you carry with you. The most attractive accessory anyone, man or woman, can wear is a smile. When you smile, you cannot help but to increase your own mood. When you do that, it is infectious. When you see someone smile at you, it is natural to smile back. We have already mentioned that smiling can make you feel good while you are doing it. So it stands to reason, someone who makes you smile, say by smiling at you, will be a person you will want to be around.
Here is something to consider. You do not only smile with your mouth. We all know people whose eyes light up when they smile. Having a welcoming posture makes you more attractive as well. If you are walking around slouched over, eyes down, with a shuffling gate, you won’t be nearly as appealing as someone who is walking upright, bright-eyed with a spring in their step. Here is another crazy thought. Smiling is not just physical. You can smile with your words. How is this possible? When you are someone who only relays the negative news of the day, or spreads today’s gossip, this will detract from your looks no matter how beautiful you are. On the flip side, if you are constantly speaking encouraging words and bringing out the best in everyone, you will be instantly more attractive.
These suggestions may sound trivial or corny to you. This does not make them any less true. Think about your own life. Would you rather spend time with someone who has a cheery disposition and always has a good word to share, or someone always spreading negative gossip and wearing a frown? I don’t know about you, but I would choose the former. While we are investing in new outfits, cologne, make up, shampoo and other things to help our physical appearance, let us not forget to invest some time and money to increase our inner beauty. Unlike the outer beauty, this investment will not fade with time.
This weekend make sure to take time to recharge. However, be aware we also need to put in the effort. Getting ahead means doing the little extra that others won’t. That means putting in some hours at night, and yes on weekends, to pursue that big dream or goal of ours.
The level of success that we achieve has a direct correlation with the amount of effort we put in. That is ax thought worth keeping in mind this weekend. When you feel like binge watching a show, or spending all day in bed, ask yourself how successful you really want to be. If you are not looking to be that successful, than stay in front of that television or in that bed. Since you are reading a blog about the secrets to an amazing life, I’m guessing you want more. Remember, you can only achieve more, by doing more!
When I was young, my grandmother used to make baked chicken legs. Trays of them! All with Open Pit BBQ sauce. She passed away many years ago. Since then, I found other chicken, and sauces I enjoy. Still, there was something that the thought of that chicken that took me back to being a kid.
Fast forward to last night. I was relaxing, watching the NFL draft. Margie, the love of my life, surprised me by making… you guessed it…baked chicken legs with Open Pit BBQ sauce! She even added some Mac and cheese to complete the memory. Did it ever take me back!
It is good to enjoy a meal, do a certain activity, or go a certain place to reconnect with those good memories. A second bonus of this delicious memory was the realization, and gratitude for, the fact that I have had 2 amazing women who are great Cooks in my life. Is there a memory you can connect with? Take some time to do so today!
If you make becoming the best version of yourself your goal, you will succeed in every area of your life. Let us take a second and think of this. If we become the best version of ourselves at work, that will make us one of the best employees. Become the best version of yourself in your friendship? Who wouldn’t want to have a friend who is the best listener, best conversationalist they can be?
This leads us to the area in which this succeeds the greatest. Being our best selves in our intimate relationship will catapult that relationship to new heights! It is my first advice to anyone having relationship trouble. Work harder on yourself than even on your relationship. Why? You will be bringing your best to the person you love. This will do one of two things. It will either impress them with your effort and improvement, which is what we hope. Even if the relationship ends, you will save yourself the worst emotion. That emotion is regret. There will be no “would have” or “should have”. You will know you brought the best of yourself to the relationship. You also will be setting yourself up the best for the future.
If you are overwhelmed and wondering where to start, just start with yourself. By improving yourself, you will be improving every area of your life. This one habit will improve every area of your life!
I recently returned from a week in the wonderful country of Jamaica. As soon as I got off the plane, I felt like a different person. Have you ever had this experience? As soon as your vacation begins, stress melts away and life just feels amazing. Whether that is driving to the mountains, flying to the tropics or any other destination. Ten years ago, I asked myself a question you may have pondered as well. “How can I carry this amazing feeling of vacation into the other 50 weeks a year that I am not on vacation?” I have spent every day since looking for the answer to the question, “How do we live like we are on vacation?” The first answers resulted in my book, A Happy Life for Busy People. It focuses on quick and simple ways to reduce stress and increase joy in your life. They all require very little effort and most can be done without spending a single cent.
As the years went by and I continued to learn more, I created my second book, Living the Dream. It took a deeper dive into how life works. How to create the relationship of your dreams. How to create a feeling of inner peace. How to better control your emotional state. How to better handle the challenges life throws at us all. How to develop a champions mindset. If any of this sounds like something you would like in your life, I suggest reading that book. To simplify this, I will put a link at the bottom where you can get all of my books. If you incorporate these tools and strategies, it will help you create a life that feels more like a vacation. Do not get me wrong, I certainly would not mind more tropical escapes with the love of my life, but every day with her seems like a dream come true. Why? We have both used the tools in this book to take our relationship to a higher level and continue to do so. We both are chasing our passion and focused on gratitude in our lives. Which leads us to the final point that will benefit you from reading my books.
With all of the self-improvement books on the market, why should you bother to pick up mine? Why did I even bother to write a book, never mind several, in a field that is already so saturated? Those are questions I get a lot. The answer is a simple one. These books were written based on two things. One, the wisdom of several very intelligent individuals. Some as far back as 500 B.C., some who are still alive today. The other is my own mistakes. That is what started my journey to begin with. My life was in a terrible state. In order to take control over my life and turn it around, I began to read. By ‘began to read’, I mean reading everything I could get my hands on. Here is what I learned. Many of the books told me that when I was in China, it was a good idea to speak Chinese, but they never taught me any of the vocabulary.
My book will not teach you how to speak Chinese. What I mean is that many books will give you practical theories, but not tell you simple ways to incorporate them. I tried the things that I read about. I recorded what worked and what did not. I tweaked them. In my books you will not only get the theory behind them, but step by step instructions on how to implement them in your own life. There are also funny personal stories of how they worked when I applied them.
If you want to change your life. If you want to start living the dream, or living like you are on vacation, I highly suggest picking up one or more of my books. Allow me to be of service to you. I put over two decades of both wins and loses, success and failure in these books. What works and what does not. It is my life’s mission to leave this world better than I found it, and that starts with you. If we can work together to take your life to a higher level, then the world, and more importantly your world, will be a little bit better. You can even share the tools with those you love and help them positively transform their lives. Whether you read my book or another, please never stop learning and improving yourself and your life. It is the best thing you can do to make the world a better place.
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 