Month: March 2025

JUST 1 DEGREE 🌡

While I continue to celebrate ice melting as winter turns to spring, I thought this quote was a great one to meditate on. It is the end of the week. It may have been a tough one. Things in the world are pretty crazy right now. There are lots of lives being turned upside down daily. The temptation to quit has never been greater for many. Sometimes just hanging on can seem like quite a struggle. Change and improvement can see like a far off horizon we cannot even see.

Think of the fact listed above. The shift of just one degree turns water, a liquid, into ice, a solid. One degree transforms it into something else entirely. I have heard this same advice applied to hitting a golf ball. Your swing can seem terribly far off, but if you just make a one millimeter change in the way you hit the ball, after going the distance, your ball will land in an entirely different area. The change is small. The result is huge. Can you see how a slight change in angle can result in an entirely different landing? How one degree can turn a liquid into a solid?

This is true is matter such as water and ice. It is true in golf and the effect of changing your starting angle. Do you know what else it is true in? Life. It can seem like everything around you is collapsing, and it might be. You might still be just one degree, or one millimeter off from a complete transformation of your life. Think of decisions we have made in our own life. Just like our examples above, the change was obvious right away, but given some time and distance, dramatic change will occur. Water takes a bit to freeze after you hit the temperature. That golf ball as to travel after you hit it at the new angle.

Think of decisions you have made. Maybe you decided to quit smoking. The change may not have happened by putting down that last cigarette, but making that decision can radically improve your life. Same with starting a new morning habit like meditation. You may not notice something on the first day, but after a month your days will feel radically different. How about writing in a gratitude journal at night? Once again, the first day may not yield any new results, but by the end of the month your life will be different.

Life may seem very overwhelming at the moment. Don’t give up. You might just be one degree, one millimeter or one decision away from an entirely different life.

2 SPECIAL DAYS IN ONE! ✌️

Today, in the Northern hemisphere, it is the first day of spring. I am normally excited for this day as I am really against all things winter. This year has been especially tough. My lovely lady and I were unable to get away as we are saving for our wedding. Making through an entire cold and gloomy winter without an escape to the tropics is quite difficult for this author. Make no mistake, it will not be warm and sunny because the calendar said it is spring. This I know. Somehow, it just is a little easier mentally knowing that it is not that far away. As I write this, I sit in a warm coffee shop staring out at a gloomy day filled with freezing rain. I know, sunshine and flowers are right around the corner.

The second thing I discovered is that it is national Neil Day. I cannot make this up. I did not realize there is such a thing. The fact that it falls on the first day of spring prompted me to take the day off of work. I am going to relax and spend the entire day with the lady I love. That gives me two fun things to celebrate. One of the great keys of life is always having something to celebrate. It not only puts you in a good mood, and allows you to be creative, but it helps you focus on being grateful as well.

To assist in that endeavor I made a small purchase. It was a desktop calendar that gives you a holiday on every day of the year! If you combine that with a day by day motivational calendar, you got a good start to any day! For just a few dollars, every day you will be greeted with a different holiday and a fun picture. You could always look them up online, but I feel it is a lot easier when it is hanging right on the wall. What is your favorite holiday? What new holidays could you discover and celebrate?

LET US CELEBRATE TOGETHER 🙌

Today is International Client Day. A celebration of all the people that make your business possible. If I am being honest, I think of the people that follow this site, or purchase my books, more as a family than clients. A like-minded community of individuals striving for a better life and to become the best version of themselves.

I am certainly grateful for every person who has ever read a word here. You are part of the family. Even more impactful are those who comment. Sharing your thoughts and opinions add quality and content to what we all share and learn here. Whether that is on this very site, in our Facebook group or anywhere else. In places such as Italy, Lebanon and England I have received great advice on books to read, people to listen to and thoughts to ponder.

All of our family, which some may call ‘clients’ I am eternally grateful! Thank you for sharing this journey with me!

THE GREATEST GIFT 🎁

It is indeed a great gift to let someone know how much you appreciate them being in your life. How often do we do this? You deserve the great feeling of making someone feel appreciated. If we are being honest, we all have quirks that can make us a challenge to be around on any given day. Myself included. Therefore, our true friends deserve the feeling of appreciation for all they do, and all they put up with.

The cool thing about making people feel appreciated is that it is a win/win situation. As we described above, you both get that feel good emotions, but there is even more. In today’s world of technology, the ways you can convey this message are endless. You can of course get together for dinner or a cup of coffee and convey it personally. That is the most heartfelt. If this feels a bit awkward at first, there are a million other options.

You can send someone a text. Maybe a message on social media? You could even post something on their social media page so everyone knows how much you appreciate them. One of the most unique ways is to send them a greeting card in the mail. For the price of that cup of coffee, you can purchase a card and stamp and send them some well wishes. The great thing about sending a message this way is that it is there in black and white. They can review it over and over again. Bringing joy to their hearts several times.

Is there someone in your life you really appreciate? How could you tell them? You could even choose multiple options. You could also send appreciation to several people. This practice will dramatically improve your life and theirs! Again, it is a win/win situation.

DISCIPLINE BUILDS WHAT MOTIVATION CAN’T 💪

Being a big fan of motivation, this quote holds extra sway. Motivation can inspire action. It is like a match that lights a fire. The tricky bit about motivation is that it varies. It can be up one day and be quite hard to find on another day. If we only did things when we felt motivated to do so, our lives would be a lot worse off. Can you imagine what your bank account would look like if you only went to work when you felt like it? How about if you only paid the electric bill when you felt motivated to do so? The house would probably be pretty dark.

Motivation can lead us down the wrong path on occasion. Like in the picture above. You may be motivated to eat half a pizza because it tastes good. If you follow doing what feels pleasurable in the moment, you can be in for a lifetime of regret and consequences. If you have the discipline to eat things that fuel your body and not just your tastebuds, you may not have the momentary joy, but you will have a long-term reward of good health. Here is the unfortunate truth, people will often discourage you from making good choices making discipline even more difficult. You will hear things such as “One bad meal won’t make that much difference.” or “You went to the gym a couple days ago. You deserve some rest.” Momentary pleasure can lead to a lifetime of regret.

Another reason to choose discipline over motivation is that it is not dependent on the opinions of others. If doing the right action for you depends on the applause and encouragement of others, what do you do when you are alone? We should work on being able to do the right thing when nobody is applauding us. Often, we can find criticism coming in our direction when we are working on discipline. Hearing things such as, “He is not at fun as he used to be. Never goes to the club and is always at the gym.” Months and years later when you are healthy and enjoying life, and their liver is shot, suddenly they may not think ‘living for the moment’ is so fun.

I am not advocating doing away with anything fun in your life. We need escapes in this stressful world. What I am cautioning against is becoming a slave to pleasure or relying on motivation to take the actions you know you need to take. Motivation is great and I encourage you to get as much of it into your life as you can. I have many great ways to do so here on this site and in my 3 books. While you are looking for ways to keep you motivated, make sure to work on your self-discipline. It will take over when motivation is no place to be found.

BE THE PERSON 😃

Anyone who knows me, or has followed this blog for any length of time, knows that I am a big fan of Mr. Rogers. I refer to him as one of my favorite modern-day philosophers. Many people think that his teachings were just for children. I could not disagree more. In today’s world, how many times have we seen adults acting out and think to ourselves, “They should have watched Mr. Roger’s episode on what to do when you feel angry.” Basic human decency and handling our own emotions are skills many of us could use a little refresher on from time to time.

There is something else that Mr. Rogers did for us that does not get enough attention. He was always one of our biggest fans. Even though he did not know many people personally, through the medium of television, he conveyed a genuine message of respect and appreciation for all of his ‘neighbors’ watching at home. We were reminded that there was something special inside each one of us. How many people in our lives speak to us this way? How many people tell us that they like us just the way we are? I am guessing not too many.

We may fall short of this belief in our character. We may speak to, or treat someone harshly. We may not do as good of job as we are able. We may not live up to our ability. Here is the thing, Mr. Rogers explained that it is important to love someone a little bit extra during those times. What a great lesson this is. We can apply it to our friends, our coworker and even our spouse. When people are disappointed in themselves, that is when they need to be loved the most. Next time you know someone has fallen short, let them know that you still “Like them just the way they are.” It will mean a lot to them and positively transform your relationship with them.

One of the most important people that we can practice this on is the person in the mirror. How many times have we done something that did not live up to our standards and then continued to punish ourselves for it long after the event? You might have been trying to eat better but caved in and had one of the free doughnuts in the break room. You meant to keep in touch with friends and relatives better, but life got busy and here it is a week later and you haven’t called. We can get down on ourselves and continue to put ourselves down for what was a step on becoming the best version of ourselves.

Nobody likes to feel the pain of regret and disappointment for an action they have taken. Here is a secret. That pain can often be a great driving force to improve our actions and attitude going forward. This I can speak to first hand. I have made many mistakes in my life, and will no doubt make many more. Do I feel disappointed in myself sometimes? Sure. I do my best to put those feelings of disappointment to work on motivating me to become the best version of myself. Even when I drop the ball and make mistakes, I know my intention is to improve and be more kind, compassionate and loving to those around me. Mistakes can be beneficial too. Knowing that even with my mistakes, I am still worthy of love and respect allows me to look in the mirror and say, “There’s no person in the world like you, and I like you just the way you are.” Does this take a while sometimes? Absolutely. Especially when I have made a big mistake. What I learned from Mr. Rogers is that it is important to be able to say this to both others and ourselves. That is the secret to compassion. That is the secret to love.

ARE YOUR ROOTS DEEP? 🌳

What a great thought this is! Trees that have a great root system underground can withstand stronger winds than those that don’t. What does this have to do with us and living an amazing life? Plenty. When you set out towards a goal, or even just life in general, there will be plenty of storms. Some are just gentle storms. You might get a flat tire. Sure, it ruins the day, but you can get back at it without too much stress and struggle. Maybe a little lost time and inconvenience.

Then, there are the more serious storms. Losing a job for example. That is like a tornado of a storm. There are still bills to be paid. Food that needs to be purchased. Gas that needs to be put in the tank. You need to have a solid support system for that one. Having a loving spouse that can ease the burden. Maybe a group of friends to help you network. The worst is the loss of someone you love. That is a category 5 hurricane. You need to have deep roots to withstand that one. A strong faith. A group of loving friends. Self-care to help keep you above water.

Here is the important point to remember. Much like trees take time to have their roots grow deep, the same is true with you and I. Deep relationships take time to build. Discovering and practicing self-care takes time. Finding a faith that speaks to you and gives you peace in time of struggle can take time. Storms, however, they can come on quick. That is why it is important to begin to work on our roots today. Foster those loving relationships. Search for a spiritual practice that works for you. If you already have one, practice it regularly. Learn about different methods of self-care and take care of yourself.

We cannot control the storms of life, but we can grow our roots to help us withstand them. One we have no control over. The other is completely in our control.

2 PART SUCCESS FORMULA 🙌

When pursuing success, many of us can overcomplicate things. The simple formula outlined above will get us wherever we want to go. It all starts with discipline. You must be able to say ‘no’ to the things that take you further from your goal and ‘yes’ to the things that bring you closer. That can be very difficult when that warm slice of pizza takes you further away, and going out in the cold to go to the gym is what brings you closer. It takes a strong will to be able to do this. As simple as it is, it is not easy.

The second part is even tougher patience, or consistency, which means doing the discipline over and over again. Even when you do not feel like it. Even when you do not see any signs that it is not working. That is how we improve. Let us say you are trying to improve your relationship. You are putting in the effort. Working on becoming a better listener. You are being more romantic. Still, your partner seems not to appreciate your efforts. It can be tempted to think they are not working and go back to having nightly shouting matches. What you may not know is that they are not fully able to trust your actions as genuine. Maybe they are working through their own feelings. The possibilities are endless really.

Being disciplined is hard. Being patient and working consistently may be even more difficult. You must know if you stick with these two actions, they will take you anywhere you want to go. The timing may be longer than you would like, but get there you will. Even if you seem to face setback after setback, that is all part of the journey. The more you get out of the way, the closer you are to achieving your goal. Write or print out this formula. Put it up somewhere you will see it daily. Work on your patience and your discipline. They will be the tools you need to build a successful life.

IT SAYS A LOT ABOUT YOU

Have you ever given much thought about how you make others feel? It is my mission in life to leave the world a better place than I found it. When Margie and I DJ together, I tell her my three goals with everyone who walks in the door is to have them laugh, feel a little bit better about themselves then when they walked in. If it is a couple, I want them to be just that little more in love with each other when they leave us. To me, making someone feel good is one of the best rewards in life. How about you?

In a world where it seems everyone is trying to be heard, how many of us are listening to each other? Sarcasm seems to be the order of the day. People try to get a laugh, often at the expense of other people’s feelings. Many people lack the basic refinement skills. Do you consider how what you are going to say may affect another person? If you do, is it to uplift, empower and encourage them? Can you imagine if we all made that our goal? Today, think of how your conversation will affect those you share it with. Do your best to lighten the load of all of those you encounter. I would love to hear a story about how someone made your day!

DEPRIVATION LEADS TO JOY 😊

This phrase may seem counterintuitive. With many observing Lent, I thought discussing fasting and sacrifice would be prudent. Many people fail to see the point of doing without. Aside from the spiritual benefits, there are some great self-improvement benefits as well. We will look at a major one that may have you rethinking how you look at giving up things.

I use the analogy of being stranded in the desert. You have no food, very little water. It is hot during the day and cold at night. In a very short time, things can get dangerous. Let’s imagine you make it  3 days and are suddenly rescued. All your rescuer had with them is water and saltine crackers. I can tell you, that will be one of the best meals you have ever had.

If I were to offer you those same two items at an “all you can eat buffet” How much would you enjoy them? For most of us in the industrialized world life is pretty much an all– you-can-eat buffet. We have a roof over our heads, clean running water, food and a place to sleep. We don’t think of these as luxurious, but take any of them away for even a day and our opinion would certainly change.

That is why fasting different things for a period helps increase our appreciation for them. This could include eating sugar,drinking coffee, or even your spouse. There is great truth to the saying, “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” I can personally attest to this. When I walk through the door after a hard days work, my lovely Margie is that much more beautiful than when I left her that morning.

How about you? Is there something you could try doing without to renew your feelings of appreciation for it?