An interesting fact about writing books. As an author, I find myself so focused on the one I am writing, I can hardly remember what are in the ones before them. Another interesting thing about being a self-improvement author, is that as you are working on your own personal journey, you often forget some of the tools and strategies you share with others. Both of these things can cause a little grief. On the opposite end of the spectrum, the good thing about writing books, or the many other things I do, is that it is there in writing. You can review it any time you want. Even better, is what happened to me last Sunday. One of your readers can come up to you and remind you of a great lesson, tool or strategy you shared.
One of the people who come to Margie and my show is named Bobby B. He was absent for a while, but stopped in to say hello this past Sunday. Bobby can best be described as a high-energy, slightly enigmatic fellow. He does like Aerosmith and frozen pizza. We have those things in common. He has also read my first 2 books. On this particular Sunday, he reminded me of something I said in the second book, Living the Dream. That the goal of self-improvement or attempting to live an amazing life is not perfection. If your goal is to be positive 100% of the time and never have another bad day again, I have some very bad news for you – you are going to be disappointed again and again.
Bobby reminded me the goal, as I had explained it, is not to live in that state. To work on decreasing the frequency and duration of those negative emotional experiences. We are all going to have days, and events in our life that just suck. Pretending they don’t exist or not exploring our emotions about them will not give us an amazing life. The goal is to fully experience them and find ways in which we can heal in some fashion. A great way is to ask yourself how you can use the pain, anger, sadness or whatever emotion you are feeling. What lesson can you learn from what you have gone through. Can you share your story with others to help them with their pain? Practicing gratitude always helps me get back to living life at the highest vibration.
I am grateful to Bobby B for this reminder. We all have bad days. When we are pursuing living a more loving and rewarding life, bad days can even make us feel like we are failing. This adds a compounding effect to the suck of a bad day or event. We must be gentle with ourselves and understand that bad days and bad situations are often what make us strong and the people we need to be. It also pays to surround yourself with ‘OQP’ as Les Brown calls them. Only Quality People. I read a quote once, I do not recall who said it, but it went something like this – true friends half our sorrows and double our joys. Sometimes talking to a caring friend can make all of the difference. I know when we are feeling down, sharing that with someone else can make us feel like a burden. Remember you are not only giving them the gift of feeling helpful and valuable to you, but you may also make them feel more comfortable to share with you when they are in need.
Bad days are never fun, but they do not mean we failed and we can make them serve a positive service. Sometimes that realization may come after the pain and sadness have passed, but if we can learn a lesson, help others or get to know ourselves better, than that bad day has served a purpose after all.