This is not a post about breaking up with a lover. It is not a post about quitting your job or any other act of finality. It is about an act that we all do at least once, sometimes several times a day. Changing how we end this act can have a very positive impact on our life and those we share it with. Today we will be learning how to end this act so that both parties leave with a smile and a desire to get together again. Doesn’t this sound like something that could be useful in your own life? This ending we are speaking about is the end of a conversation.
This is something we often give little or no thought to. Most of the time, we just let conversations end themselves. Here is a somewhat morbid, but never-the-less true statement. At some point, the conversation you are going to have with someone will be the last. What would you say and how would you like them to feel if that were the case? It might not be this week, it might not be today, but then again…it might be. That is part of the craziness of the world; we never know.
While you are keeping that sobering thought in mind, I encourage you to ask yourself a question as well. This may seem like a lot of work, but stick with me. Not only will this pay off with both better conversations as well as better relationships. Ask yourself, “How do I want this person to feel when they leave me?” Have you ever encountered people who after you are done talking with them you want to take a shower to wash off the negativity? I have. Have you also left someone and just felt inspired and like their company was a real breath of fresh air? I think it would be safe to say we have all had our share of both of those situations. Now, think of how many times you have consciously acted to affect a conversation you are having? You have that power!
I would love to give you a personal example. The other day my mother and I met for coffee. Both of our schedules are usually pretty busy and walks or coffee are welcome escapes. They always come with great conversation. On this evening as our time together was drawing to a close, we found ourselves discussing the somewhat absurd nature of political ads. The fact that they spend great amounts of money to tell you how terrible their opponent is without actually telling you what they will do for you or any solution they may have. If you don’t believe me, feel free to check your mail or turn on the television. As with any conversation to do with politics, this started to leave us feeling drained and frustrated. The thought occurred to me, “Is this how I want us to go home feeling?” The obvious answer was “No”. I began to make a conscious effort to steer the conversation to a more inspiring and positive tone.
We all have the power to do this. Even with people that enjoy each other’s company, such as my mother and I in the example above, the conversation can take an occasional downturn. The more we make an effort to keep our conversations uplifting and encouraging, the more people will want to have them with us. That is not to say we should be ignorant or fake, but to find ways to see the positive side of even the darkest subjects we discuss. We should also make a point to end our conversations in such a way that both parties leave with joy in their hearts and a smile on their face. How do you end your conversation to make sure everyone leaves with a smile?
SECRET 2 AN AMAZING LIFE 